A give on a give

A give on a give

Preston Vander Ven wrote a great buzz on Top Ways to Market Yourself on beBee. Javier beBee wrote a buzz in response to this buzz titled "Give without expecting anything in return". In his buzz Javier wrote "Give. This is important to do on any social networking site, not just beBee, but it’s particularly important to do on here. It is human nature for people to be focused on wanting to receive something for themselves or their business. Give before you take- is this a wise advice?

Before responding I want to highlight one important fact. Not all actions in this world are completely reversible and they may favor one direction. To explain this fact visually I refer to a buzz by Louise Smith. The buzz shared the following image:

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Imagine this situation now. You have a person with his feeling thermometer is 1. This person meets with a colleague with whom he had recently a conflict with. This second man has his feeling thermometer reading 10. Now, ask yourself this simple question. Would person one with feeling thermometer 1 talk to person 2 with same thermometer reading 10? Or, would it be better if the second out of control person start talking first? Is the same A talking to B or if B talks to A? Well, we never add cold water to boiling oil and it is much safer if we add boiling oil to cold water gradually. If not, the oil shall splash and cause us burns. It is one way- add B to A.

So, this discussion leads me to give and take. Give first and then take or take first and then give. They aren't the same. Taking the right direction is immensely important. I discovered this and showed why it is give and then take. You may read my presentation on Fixed Vs. Variable and see ample proofs why it should be give and then take.

55f67e45.jpgΒ  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β  Β Click on the image to go to the presentation

I give many real life examples of my own experiences in the presentation why it should be give before you take. I don't need to repeat them here. I only explain the common rational here. If I recommend and comment on the buzzes of one author and share them Even, I write a buzz on a buzz then how much cost in time or money this will infect on the author? Zero cost for getting the attention of his work. The delight of the author is a maximum while the cost or pain is zero. Now divide the benefit or delight (maximum) over the cost or pain (0) and the result is infinite delight. When we make people delightful we send them in the mood to acknowledge and eventually they shall respond wholeheartedly by commenting and sharing on my buzzes. Give infinite delight to your fellow bees and eventually you shall take their gratitude.
It is not take and then give. It doesn't work. You want the proof? See the reaction to this buzz.


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Comments
Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#77
You are very correct dear friend . If we help in educating people we may be removing the root causes of many troublesome issues. I assure you I am the product of learning from you and many great bees here on beBee. Thank you

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#74
It shall be a mistake not to read your forthcoming buzz CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit. Please tag me when you publish.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#73
Exactly dear Donna-Luisa Eversley as I experienced this joy while reading your comment. I loved the depth of you saying "Imagine how great it feels knowing you are a small part of a great thing, because you give". Actually, I don't need to imagine because your comment is enough to live this joy.

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

4 years ago #61

#68
Yes, this is a very good idea - I am looking to produce this by Friday or at least by the weekend. A fellow student has asked for my help in the area of Agile which I am also studying and I also want to write a buzz about a couple of people and their personal brand which I had aimed to do last Sunday. The title of the buzz on disruptive approach to giving will be entitled "The Mistake of Take" and naturally it will be another Paradox Wisdom linked to this buzz. I look forward to putting that together.

Milos Djukic

Milos Djukic

4 years ago #60

#4
Thank you Ali Anani, my dear friend :)

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#70
I am so glad that you spotted the overall reaction is to give first. Tank you for your valuable feedback Franci\ud83d\udc1dEugenia Hoffman

Franci 🐝Eugenia Hoffman, beBee Brand Ambassador

I'm a little late in reading this valuable post but so glad I didn't miss it. I enjoyed this immensely, Ali, and the comments, as well. IMO, taking is the reward received from giving. And yes, Ali, the reaction to this buzz proves that it's not take and then give.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #57

#67
Invaluable Ali Anani!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#63
"This means we should contemplate a disruptive approach to giving" I feel this line on its own deserves brainstorming among bees. I wonder if you would initiate this discussion my friend CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit. If for any reason your answer is no, and I hope not, then I shall be happy to initiate it.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#66
Your buzzes are self-supporting with your quality writing and thinking Sara Jacobovici. Your two buzzes shine. I am totally absorbed by both of them. I hope that you find my two comments worthy.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #54

#65
Your ongoing support is much appreciated Ali Anani. Thank you.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Sara Jacobovici has just published a buzz on this buzz titled "Purpose; do we have a choice"? https://www.bebee.com/producer/@sara-jacobovici/purpose-do-we-have-a-choice I have just commented on this great buzz by Sara. I invite dears Harvey Lloyd to read her buzz because they shall find it extremely illuminating in view of your comments here. It is a must read.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #52

#63
AI has no expectations, for the moment. Your comment speaks to the circle of existence. We all give with an opportunity to take at the most advantageous times. These times are when the circle itself is rewarded because of the giving. Your question within the comment is when and how does the circle get broken? What happens when someone or entity begins to take from the circle prior to the reward of giving? I believe this question gets to the crux of our current status socially. I hate to generalize but sense it applies, i must be fulfilled prior to giving. On the surface not a bad scenario until we look at the whole of the circle. Its no longer a circle but rather a linear group of dominos that can't line up. These are societal, fundamental belief system discussions. Challenging at best and drives war at its worst. The individual is always faced with the burning question of leaning on the circle or adjusting their domino for self interest. These represent the dichotomy of choices.

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

4 years ago #51

#35
Robots have not yet passed the Turing Test so Robots don't take income from people, the conventional mindset of people do. The disruption that robots and artificial intelligence cause is driven by a mindset. Artificial intelligence simply supercharges that resident mindset. This mindset resides because it is the prevailing orthodoxy. A constructive but disruptive mindset creates creative long-term effects We in turn give in a very conventional way and a conversation about giving touches our conventional sensibilities - and thus we engage in a conversation that is a feel good conversation about giving. It then essentially becomes the converted talking to one another about the benefits of giving. What disturbs us is that if giving alone was the solution to poverty, we would see much greater effects. This conversation allows us to prosper more than the poor. This means we should contemplate a disruptive approach to giving. The conventional way is that we give and then we get. The disruptive way is that giving as a disruption is what it does to the overall system and that means we follow the money. We are not concerned here about the money we give, but the process of receiving - because there is an entire industry built around giving that combines with a culture which executives use to get promotions, while the effort of giving is directed at their employees. There is power involved in giving and we won't touch that and there is a black box in giving that tests our own mindset. Otherwise we have a rather nice conversation about giving. So what gets effected through artificial intelligence also becomes way of looking at giving also, a more integrated way, a way that allows us to give but also question the entire process of giving and then we can make use of disruptions for creation and not even more destruction - unintended consequences.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#59
You open complete lines of thinking. I feel that "The Tree of Discussions" started new branches with your very thoughtful comment Harvey Lloyd. You introduce what I consider "degrees of freedom". For example, you wrote "In other words does give get applied based on the others statements/actions"? This is a conditional statement and therefore we have a less degree of freedom. In fixed rules that nature follows such as flocking of birds or branching of trees so that they don't deny each other sunshine and humidity, they apply regardless of the extrinsic conditions. So, I see that nature. You leave me with a lot to think about. For example, some trees do break the rules to get more exposure to light. To what degree fixed is fixed? I need a pause for more serious thinking.

Liesbeth Leysen, MSc. beBee Global Brand Ambassador

#43
sugar sweet soul ;-) Ali Anani

Liesbeth Leysen, MSc. beBee Global Brand Ambassador

#45
thank you Ali Anani

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #47

The complexity of this concept is very broad, but ties back to your recent post concerning "rules". When we look onto (Extrinsic) a situation we see give and take, when we ourselves are involved in choosing to give or take (Intrinsic) is this conditional on the extrinsic? In other words does give get applied based on the others statements/actions? This is where the rules you suggested within the intrinsic realm would apply. Dr Jung and the subsequent Myers-Briggs test suggests that one of the two last letters of the test's outcome is either P (Perceiving) or J (Judgement). The judgement definition in the case of understanding Jung's theory, is a high J person needs to bring things into a right or wrong argument before they can proceed with their choices. Not judgement of someone's character. I am a "J" i have to work at and develop skills to allow for things that are not always in the right and wrong category. The "rules" you suggested are what keep my J in check, most of the time. http://understandmyersbriggs.blogspot.com/p/description-of-8-letters.html We cannot give unless our rules secure us in our own person and allow, unconditionally, the take of others. This sounds like the benevolent society rule set. We all fall short of this action. My hope is on the day i fall short you are courageous enough to allow my shortcomings and bring me back to give. With each interaction where give and take might happen, each party wants something. Giving is understanding what each party needs from the encounter. Taking is the act of telling the other what they want, how it will be. Always enter with, "Seek first to understand", Steven Covey.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#57
Thank you . Will surely consider your suggestion. You can't imagine how many ideas started colliding in my head. It is as if I disturbed an idea hive.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Just an idea crossed my mind and may be of interest to you dear readers. We say give promises and break them- this is the kind of giving that we can live without. We need the trust of others to accept what we offer them. SP many ideas are crossing my mind. I shall cover them soon.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#54
Your stop by and appreciation are great "takes" for me dear Sara Jacobovici. You have been very generous in sharing your views and comments.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #43

I just finished reading your buzz and links and the dynamic discussion that is taking place here Ali Anani. I have only received and have given nothing in return except my appreciation to you all.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#51
This is a very sensible comment . You summed our thoughts beautifully. You give more than "a little bit of your mind". On a personal level I had my share and I am extremely thankful to you.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#48
At least I guarantee that your comments are "precious memory" for me dear siraj shaik

Julio Angel 🐝Lopez Lopez

#48
True, and if they are of the heart they are sublime.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#46
Thank you for sharing your experience @Julio Angel \ud83d\udc1dLopez Lopez. My friend- you said it beautifully when we give it shouldn't be a debt to the receiver. It turns to a burden. That some people flee for fear they might have to return something then this is a way of "sieving" good people from people with whom we may better to keep a distance with. I love your introduction of this idea to the discussion.

Julio Angel 🐝Lopez Lopez

Give, whenever I have given, I have never expected to take. I have never asked for a return, not even for feelings. Sometimes there are even people who have disappeared, probably for believing that I had to return something, without dialogue, without opportunity to clarify that what I did was of heart and the heart should not nest debt if you want to sleep in peace. As always Mr Ali Anani waking up high thoughts, thank you.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#41
siraj shaik that giving leads to more learning. I add here more learning gives again more joy. You did Liesbeth.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#42
Very remarkable observation and siraj shaik. It is a cyclic loop more than it is a linear one. Very true as both sharing and learning feedback to each other. WOW! New ideas are jumping in front of my eyes.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#39
You are a sweet soul

Liesbeth Leysen, MSc. beBee Global Brand Ambassador

#40
bee-ing among our sweet bees gives us wings to soar ;-) Ali Anani thank you!!!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#38
Smuch as you your comment gives me pleasure dear . Thank you and TAKE my word- you are a great human.

Liesbeth Leysen, MSc. beBee Global Brand Ambassador

read and share as many times as your bee muscles can!

Liesbeth Leysen, MSc. beBee Global Brand Ambassador

love it Ali Anani giving is receiving! you give a lot, so I wish you to receive endless honey joy!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#34
Scarcity in some areas and surplus in others such as unemployment dear

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#33
Your comment made me delightful Paul Walters

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#32
you keep teasing my mind dear CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit' They take jobs and produce in abundance- they are disrupting our lives. The next question becomes- can we deal with disruptive issues as we do with conventional ones? Yes, we need to think deeper.

🐝 Fatima G. Williams

🐝 Fatima G. Williams

4 years ago #27

#32
We are heading to scarcity ? I think scarcity prevails already in some places. You explain very clearly the reality around us. I am so glad you took to the time to give.Thank you.

Paul Walters

Paul Walters

4 years ago #26

Ali Anani " When we make people delightful" what a splendid phrase !!!!

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

4 years ago #25

#29
Economics moving ahead is not human but artificial intelligence. When blue collar and white collar jobs are lost to robots, intelligently giving becomes an economic necessity. This boils down to governments giving people incomes to counter the effect of displaced work. We cannot utilize the existing model of human charity in addressing economic abundance and eventually an idea of basic income becomes a means of countering artificial intelligence effects. Finland is already preempting this giving model https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjLtuRXTIro and it is unfortunate because the current reality does not reflect the reality of artificial intelligence empowered abundance. So long as our political thinking is mired in talk of left and right and not just left and right brain - we will fail to address the supply and demand model that adds massive contribution via artifiical intelligent led value creation but also create insufficient demand because people cannot afford to buy that supply. If this is the case and it is politics as usual we have escalation of extreme polarization. I am right handed which means that my left brain controls that hand, so my right hand knows what my left hand is doing - my left is the impoverished hand because I have not trained it to do anything other than support what my right hand does. The idea that our left hand not know what our right hand is doing says much about a right brain (controls the left hand). I am therefore not as creative as I would like to be but I can sleep at night because my right hand definitely knows what my left hand is doing - and that makes me a person who employs control - yet who talks about freedom. I am not free of the economics of division but I can see the forthcoming problems of abundance and if our present ideas about giving are not re-thought - we are heading to total scarcity.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#30
What a great question that you ask Deb \ud83d\udc1d Helfrich! I experienced the answer indirectly. People who tend only to take and not give tend to become progressively greedy and only to rech the criticality of their greed and collapse. They end up losing everything. If not by instinct, then at least by observing what happens to greedy people like them.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#28
One thing I am quite sure about CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit is that your right minds talks to your left mind because your comments are always sensible and idea-rich. Can the right mind talk to the left mind without the right hand sensing the left hand? One point at this late hour of the midnight here that crosses my mind is the relative meaning of rare. A coin might be worthless to a rich man, but hugely important to a poor man. Yet; in spite of its unimportance the rich might not give the coin to a needy poor. We might be rich in other things and poor in others. At least, we may give good words, a clap, or a little bit of what we are rich of. I am scratching my head as your comments always inflict on me. If Ifail to fall asleep then I know why.

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

4 years ago #22

#26
Personally I think that Matthew 6:3 provides an interesting guide in the verse that says : "But when you give to someone in need, don't let your left hand know what your right hand is doing." So the first truth here is that we are giving to already satisfied people and that is a far different form of giving. We of course can also be unsatisfied people with material wealth. Whether we are satisfied or unsatisfied we are living in abundance and talking of giving as if we are living in scarcity. Here a much larger ego can come into play and it is an ego in giving that we must pay more attention to. This ego is that of spiritual ego. The movie "The Last Temptation of Christ" is based on the premise of spiritual ego, with the hypothetical scenario of what happens if Christ succumbed to spiritual ego. We know the return on giving today more than we know the return on investment. So there is intention involved. Is it wiser to give before taking, of course. Yet it does not lessen the reality that if we are living in absolute abundance then what we give in absolute abundance is not the same as something rare and that maybe economically, emotionally or spiritually more difficult to give. If we take no heed of the effects of spiritual ego then we take no heed to prosperity preachers who have built fortunes on a philosophy of giving. So we need to evaluate giving in that larger context and at least I ask myself, whether my right hand also knows what my left hand is doing.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#16
How about Building Collaboration?

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#21
I too extend an invitation to CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit. Who wouldn't welcome his wisdom?

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#22
Thank you my friend Lisa \ud83d\udc1d Gallagher. I am particularly happy because reading this buzz will improve if accompanied by reading the slideshow. Yes, your example of tweetpack is great. Giving it for free also creates the feeling of ownership and who would easily dispose with what she owns? I applied this concept and it worked wonderfully. I am sharing my own experience here- for FREE.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#20
Oh my dear Tausif Mundrawala- it is almost one after midnight. So tomorrow I shall suggest a title

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#19
My dear - you gave me infinite delight with your super comment. "We have to understand, give and wait to receive only then we can grow"- a pack of wisdom this is. I may suggest a little change- I would change the word wait to expect. Brilliant you are, Fatima.

Lisa Gallagher

Lisa Gallagher

4 years ago #16

Great slide show Ali Anani approached his tweetpack app. It's working well and those of us that were using it for free during beta testing still benefited. The benefits from tweetpack made me want to purchase and I did. Same goes with sharing other's material... I find it easy to do because there is so much great material being produced and it benefits beBee's growth. I want to see beBee grow, so it's easy for me to share others material vs. my own. Great points here and enjoyed your slideshow!!

🐝 Fatima G. Williams

🐝 Fatima G. Williams

4 years ago #15

CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit

🐝 Fatima G. Williams

🐝 Fatima G. Williams

4 years ago #14

Another apt buzz Ali Anani It ultimately boils down to My beBee lesson. "In giving We receive In receiving We learn In learning We Grow." Lets grow as a community here with something to give someone everyday. May be just a smile or a virtual hug or some valuable experience or it may even go on to gaining an excellent business connection. But Patience is the key We cannot expect to grow in one day its takes nines month for a baby to be formed We have to understand, give and wait to receive only then we can grow. If our moms decided not to give us their flesh and blood where would we all be. "Givinv infinite delight to my fellow bees and peace to all" Stay awesome always #beBeelove #beBeesforever

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#16
I agree entirely with you. Please expand this comment into a buzz.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I agree entirely with you. Please expand this buzz into a comment.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#13
Absolutely delighted with your comment dear Tausif Mundrawala. You expressed very well what author bees expect and to give the joy of meeting their expectation is a great reward for them. Thank you so much for highlighting this worthy point.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#10
I am delighted and joyful to read your comment Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee Fractals forever is beBee

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#9
Wisely expressed comment and subtly used words. Thank you my friend Yogesh Sukal for your lovely feedback.

Javier 🐝 CR

Javier 🐝 CR

4 years ago #8

This is brilliant. Many thanks It is not take and then give. It doesn't work. Give first, then you can take.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee
Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#5
Dear debasish majumder- bees go to flowers and bees flowers don't go to bees. This is one way movement. The same is give and take. Give nectar and bees shall come to you. It is give is the essence of noble life.

Bill Stankiewicz, 🐝 Brand Ambassador

COOL!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Thank you both dears Milos Djukic for sharing this buzz. You give without taking. You are my noble friends.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#2
Thank you my friend Laurent Boscherini as your comment and quote both ooze wisdom.

Laurent Boscherini

Laurent Boscherini

4 years ago #2

Thank you my dear friend Ali Anani for your insightful sharing so deeply rooted by your humanity. β€œDo not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” ~ Epicurus.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee- you are mentioned in this buzz.

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