Avoid Building Concrete Relationships

Avoid Building Concrete Relationships

The societal 4-cycle theory was put forward by the Indian philosopher and spiritual leader‚ Prabhat Ranjan Sarkar in the 1950s and expanded by‚ Ravi Batra‚ since the 1970s,‚ Johan Galtung‚ and‚ Sohail Inayatullah‚ since the 1990s.

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 If we look carefully at the social cycle and ponder on when the social upheaval starts we find that it follows the acquisitor stage in which the wealth is distributed unequally. The rich becomes richer and the poor get poorer. The presence of unequal gaps in any society shall lead to its destabilization. This is a rule and to restore stability governments tend to use the rule of force. This solution might be temporarily successful, but shall eventually fail. It is then followed by the rule of ideas in which intellectuals with creative ideas start reshaping the society.

This makes me wonder sometimes when I read statements like "we need to cement our relationship", or "we are trying to build our relationship on a concrete ground". Both cement and concrete tend to form gaps in varying sizes. Once this is allowed the concrete shows ailing signs such as cracking. May be you have seen cracks in concrete that resemble a honeycomb. It is not only bees that build honeycombs; low-quality concrete does so as well.

Like we need to maintain the regularity of voids in concrete so that it retains its strength, we need to do the same with our social relationships. If we inspect social networks we shall find what we call structural gaps in which two nodes fail to connect. The presence of few gaps or voids with varying sizes is bound to weaken the social network structures as voids are detrimental to concrete if present in widely varying sizes.

Intentions don't build enduring concrete relationships; in contrast they may produce an adverse effect. I witness many gaps taking place on social platforms. I received a message from a bee apologizing that he doesn't share my buzzes because he doesn't like to be bombarded by notifications. The funny part of his message was that he requested me to share his buzz. He doesn't mind that I get bombarded by notifications to use his words.
One main reason for creating voids in our relationships is selfishness. This may only lead to the creation of voids in our concrete-like relationships and thus weakening the concrete to fall apart. Other factors include the freezing and thawing of our relationships. You may have noticed that some bees may show tremendous zeal and engagement to what you contribute only for this zeal to fade away. This cycling of freeze and thaw can cause the cracking of concrete upon which we worked hard to keep in good shape.

Premature asking for favors is another cause for weakening any social platform. Fresh concrete has pores which are filled with water. If we freeze a new relationship prematurely the water in the pores freezes and may cause the concrete to crack. Sometimes the wrong timing of freezing a relationship can be damaging to the concrete ground.

I dare say that what cracks concrete or cause it to flake is extensible to social networks. What keeps social networks structures isn't different from what keeps concrete in buildings strong.

Be careful when you say that we have a concrete-like structure or relationship unless you are aware of what it takes to keep concrete in good shape and strength.


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Comments
Lyon Brave L

Lyon Brave

6 months ago #151

Who needs relationships when there is pie.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#226
My pleasure

Manuel Chinchilla da Silva

Manuel Chinchilla da Silva

2 years ago #149

Thanks for the info!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#224
Thank you and I am sure your photos reflect your awesomeness

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I appreciate your sharing the buzz dear mirela xhota

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I appreciate your sharing of this almost three years old buzz mirela xhota. Such appreciation is like wine, the older the better.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Ivonne Teoh-- you hydrated my soul and heart with your super comment. You made my day joyful. Thank you

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#217
Thank you Ivonne Teoh for contributing a remarkable comment. Yes, social gaps are cold rigidity gaps and they lead to the disruption of the society afterwards. Resilience and flexibility weaken with increasing connectedness and you are spot on. Big hug to you from Jordan. I do hope to read more of your thoughtful comments.

Lyon Brave L

Lyon Brave

3 years ago #143

clever

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#213
as always, your thougbts are greatly appreciated Isabella M H Wesoly. Yes. Even concrete without water is only a rigid mess. Water represents our life flows.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#211
I truly enjoyed your honest comment . It is different from all previous comm÷nts. Yes, may be it is the weak ties on social media that keeps the flow. You remind me of the rubber metaphor. If rubber chains are slightly cross-liked they remain flexible. However; heavily cross-linking them make the rubber hard like tyres. Very strong connections are also huge resonsibility which may preclude our movement.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#208
First, I want to thank dear Debasish Majumder for sharing this buzz and drawing more great comments. Thank you Proma \ud83d\udc1d Nautiyal Your writing "they need to think long term and base their actions on those thoughts" inspired me with an idea for a buzz. Thank you

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#207
Thank you Harvey Lloyd. Your assurance is of high importance to me.

Proma 🐝 Nautiyal

Proma 🐝 Nautiyal

3 years ago #138

This is so true, Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee! I have experienced this in real life, too. I believe this happens because some people don't think in macro terms, they prefer to live in their own myopic view of the world. If somebody truly wants to build a long-term relationship, personal or professional, they need to think long term and base their actions on those thoughts. Thank you for this buzz! ] Thank you, Debasish Majumder for sharing this buzz!

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

3 years ago #137

#206
Debasish Majumder thanks for this pull from history. It is often intriguing to review our past and this was a very interesting review. The comments and subsequent discussion was viewed quite differently from today than it was at the time. Still a great post and holds true today Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Debasish Majumder

Debasish Majumder

3 years ago #136

intriguing buzz indeed sir Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee! i wonder, when unity of thought enable us to align, how come we can visualize an entirely abstract format which may cause disaster to our relationship! however, enjoyed read and shared. thank you very much for the share.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#202
"it is one more bit of evidence in the connectedness of al". This is my belief as well. l. I have written few buzzes n this and the more I think the more I find your statement viable Joanne Gardocki

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#200
Let me see what if I may write a buzz on this interesting dialogue Joanne Gardocki

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#197
I found the reference for the serial killers and natural disasters analogy Joanne Gardocki http://science.howstuffworks.com/innovation/science-questions/10-2012-discoveries3.htm

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#197
Excellent example of analogy Joanne Gardocki. Now, you got me thinking. It is interesting that you mentioned earthquakes. You now recently a discovery was made in that serial killers time their killing unintentionally with power laws- same as earthquakes do.

Bill Stankiewicz, 🐝 Brand Ambassador

Very interesting

Lyon Brave L

Lyon Brave

4 years ago #130

interesting

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

4 years ago #129

#187
Mohammed, I obviously agree about the excessive use, or rather the misuse of metaphor. However, logic does not "distort logic" mostly because logic has to do with patterns of reasoning, and never in itself can claim to determine truth. Logic is only concerned with assuring that if we start with true premises or assumptions, we reach similarly true conclusions. Logic does not, and cannot determine if our assumptions or premises are themselves true. Cheers!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#189
Thank you for focusing the discussions Robert Bacal. Analogies are there to help and at least in my case my imagination. Not all analogies are of the same power and the readers shall resonate with the ones that sounds good to them.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#187
Too much of anything spoils and I agree with you Mohammed Sultan on avoiding the excessive use of metaphors.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#185
Interesting- George Armani wold enjoy your humor as I did dear Phil Friedman:))). I understand you are sure now of my pure respect to you.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

4 years ago #125

#184
yes, eventually fat fingers on small iPhone touch screens may even promote you to Dr, "Armani" -- which would certainly make the fabric of conversation even more valuable. :-)

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#183
Believe me that I understood and respected your views Phil Friedman. In fact, I am extremely thankful to you for opening channels for extended discussions. I do appreciate your comments and I agree with you that we have to be aware of the shortcomings of metaphors. I don't know why you got this impression when in reality I am very grateful for your solid and honest comments. I fully understand that is topic is debatable and in no way I claim my point of view isn't distorted. I am learning from rich comments such as yours. I am glad you addressed your comment to Dr. Amani and not Anani because I appreciate greatly your contributions.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

4 years ago #123

#182
With all due respect, Dr. Amani, I trust you do not see my comments in the same category as the case you describe to Mohammed, for I am not in any way "attacking" the use of metaphors, similes, analogies or the like as tools of communication and elucidation. My point is that we all, myself included, have a tendency at times to become so enamored of the representing object in a metaphor that we forget it is not identical to the represented object, and we begin to draw conclusions about the represented object that are not warranted. Which, by the way, is one reason why literature and metaphysics are not science. My best to you. Cheers!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#181
With all honesty dear Mohammed Sultan even people who object to using metaphors they use them without being aware. I read once an article on the internet and the author attacked heavily our use of metaphors. I counted more than ten examples of metaphors that he used in his article. The response was the author deleted the post!

Lada 🏡 Prkic

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #121

#178
Phil, I should apologize to you. Your explanation about models was at the academic level. I do love to hear a good lecture or presentation. In fact, I am involved in the program of lifelong learning/permanent education and professional development in the field of Civil Engineering, and constantly attend various seminars and lectures. I am looking forward to seeing more comments like yours, whatever the topic.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

4 years ago #120

#177
Lada, I apologize if it appeared that I was seeking to lecture you (or for that matter, Dr. Anani), for I was not -- certainly not at a "high school" level. But, I believe that discussion in a forum such as this as requires keeping in mind that not everyone reading, although usually intelligent and educated, will be familiar with concepts and issues that are somewhat on the academic or esoteric side. And so may require a bit more explanation for clarity. That said, I understand and agree with your view that a "good analogy" aid in the communication of scientific knowledge and concepts. However, I have to point out that there is a significant difference between communicating a concept or making it clearer by means of an analogy, and seeking to "explore" the implications contained within the analogy before establishing, even informally that the analogy is sufficiently isomorphic in important respects to qualify as a "model" for further investigation or exploration. Nevertheless, I do not question for a moment the "Wisdom of Chung King" that one can tell a lot about people from the metaphors they employ. Cheers!

Lada 🏡 Prkic

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #119

#169
#170 Phil, I appreciate your detailed explanation (it reminded me of the high school lecture), although I understood what you said in the first comment. It seems to me that you, perhaps, overanalyzed the use of an analogy in this post. You clearly said that you're not a big fan of using metaphors in exploring a concept such as friendship, and I accept that fact as your opinion. On the contrary, I am a big fan of a good analogy, even in scientific writings. I always welcome when someone tries to communicate his/her knowledge or conveys an idea in such a way. Choosing a figure of speech may also be a matter of artistic licence. That is why a specific analogy, metaphor, or simile might work for me but won't work for someone else. I like what Ali Anani said: „They are mental model for a while.“ I would also add one more wisdom by Chung King: „You get to know people through their metaphors.“ :)

Lada 🏡 Prkic

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #118

#169
#170 Phil, I appreciate your detail explanation (it reminded me of the high school lecture), although I understood what you said in the first comment. It seems to me that you, perhaps, overanalyzed the use of an analogy in this post. You clearly said that you're not a big fan of using metaphors in exploring concepts such as friendship, and I accept that fact as your opinion. On the contrary, I am a big fan of a good analogy, even in scientific writings. I always welcome when someone tries to communicate his/her knowledge or conveying an idea in such a way. Choosing a figure of speech may also be a matter of artistic licence. That is why a specific analogy, metaphor, or simile might work for me, but won't for someone else. I like what Ali Anani said: „They are mental model for a while.“ I would also add one more wisdom by Chung King: „You get to know people through their metaphors.“

Lada 🏡 Prkic

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #117

#169
#170 Phil, I appreciate your detail explanation (it reminded me of the high school lecture), although I understood what you said in the first comment. It seems to me that you, perhaps, overanalyze the use of an analogy in this post. You clearly said that you're not a big fan of using metaphors in exploring concepts such as friendship, and I accept that fact as your opinion. On the contrary, I am a big fan of a good analogy, even in scientific writings. I always welcome when someone tries to communicate his/her knowledge or conveys an idea in such a way. Choosing a figure of speech may also be a matter of artistic licence. That is why a specific analogy, metaphor, or simile might work for me but won't work for someone else. I like what Ali Anani said: "They are mental model for a while.“ I would only add one more wisdom by Chung King: "You get to know people through their metaphors.“

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #116

#171
Be sure and leave some bread crumbs. Sometimes i need them to get back. Thanks for the dialogue and discussions they do require a level of thinking beyond our own understanding, you help me reflect.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#169
You remind me of the model Kekule developed for the formula of benzene. A snake biting its tail and orbiting electrons biting their till this concept was proven experimentally.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#170
Truly, I understand your comment better now Phil Friedman. yes, and the fact that we modify or improve on a metaphor or even replace it by a better one reflect dynamism of metaphors. They are not static, comprehensive or complete. However; they help us move forward. The fact that these ongoing discussions sis the proof. They act as a spotlight and as we move the spotlight, change its angle and replace it with a better one will reveal more. They are mental model for a while.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#168
Believe me I see more of you dar Harvey Lloyd. Your knowledge and wisdom are very impressive. Every comment of yours makes me think deeper and deeper.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

4 years ago #112

#151
#154 -- Dr. Anani and Lada, I fear that I have expressed myself with inadequate clarity. What I meant to convey is not that metaphors are without value. Indeed, I sometimes resort to them in my own writing and, in fact, did so just the other day in "Life Is Like a Monza Wall" ( https://www.bebee.com/producer/@friedman-phil/life-is-like-a-monza-wall ) What I intended to say is that it is intellectually perilous to slide into using a metaphor or a simile as an exploratory conceptual model, unless one separately gains confidence in the efficacy of the model. Observable physical models are explored because they are found to mimic the internal relational properties of systems that we cannot directly observe. For example, the properties of water flowing in pipes (directly observable) model electricity "flowing" in wires (not directly observable). Once we've gained confidence in the accuracy of the model (its isomorphism with that which it models) by means of predictive and retrodictive success, we may choose to explore further the properties of the observable model -- as a way of indirectly exploring the properties of the unobservable system that is being modeled. Cont... Pt II

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

4 years ago #111

#151
#154 - Pt II - Sometimes the model is conceptual, as when we use in engineering a mathematical formula or set of formulae to model and predict the physical behavior of an engineered structure, say. a bridge. We can do this because we've gained a high level of confidence that the elements of the formula relate to one another in a manner that is isomorphic with the interrelationships of the mechanical properties of the materials and structure of the bridge. We can also, by using a mathematical model, explore the interactions between factors such as the moment of inertia (I) of the cross section of a structural member and its resistance to deflection, because we've previously gained confidence in the efficacy of the model. None of this is true of a metaphor. And I believe it a conceptual mistake to treat a literary metaphor or simile -- which admittedly may be useful to convey clearly an "insight" -- as a model that can be explored in the service of "unpacking" further "truths" about the target element of the metaphor. IMO. Cheers! CC: Milos Djukic

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #110

#162
Serial Inner Thinking (SIT)... Journeys in self awareness (JSA)...Natural Paths...New Life Narrative(NLN)... I'm seeing a whole new you Ali. cc:Tausif Mundrawala

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#165
Tausif Mundrawalap Erudite Sages as I find it more musical to my ear. How about you?

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#163
Will abide and do. Thatnk you dear Tausif Mundrawala

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#159
I shall do dear Tausif Mundrawala. ANy idea what to name it? I appreciate your very kind words. You are a genuine motivator.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #106

#160
Good Analogy and factual demonstration of the reader's point of view when engaging metaphors.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#158
I agree when I am in agreement. I agree with what you expressed clearly Harvey Lloyd. This is based on my own experiences. For example, when I used diving as a metaphor for leadership those readers who hadn't experienced diving the metaphor was dull. http://www.slideshare.net/hudali15/diving-into-leadership This was evidenced from the below average number of comments the presentation received. However; the metaphor of driving cars to help us in driving businesses was welcomed warmly. The presentation was selected the presentation of the day and the number of views and comments exceeded the diving one by a considerable margin. I agree for a reason as you can see.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #104

#148
I will agree here on the concept of metaphors may be useful for the writer but may not be seen in the context given, by the reader. Several of your recent posts Ali Anani have been challenged based on the reader's inability interpret your presentation and context of the metaphor of concrete and relationships. Although i enjoy the metaphors they are subject to individual interpretation. Use them wisely and accordingly i suppose. In my line of work i study the behaviours of children and the various impacts their environment has on them. I read a study whereby reading ability was the focus of behavioural effect. The study covered many aspects of reading but the one that has stuck out prominently is the metaphor aspect of this conversation. Many children never leave their city, hometown or village. So when you say the word beach or warm sand they have no concept of the metaphoric meaning of the words. They are just words. They don't align with any experiences. It changed my concept of words, children and as a grandparent my actions. My actions as a grandparent is to engage my children and grandchildren in experiences that give meaning to words. So that when they read posts, books and engage in conversation their mind can bring forward the experiences. Thanks @Phil Friedman for a new perspective of the use of metaphors.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#156
Again, Sara Jacobovici your prove your worth of the title "The Queen of Paradoxes". This comment is the proof. That you wrote with such length and comprehension is exciting for me because it shows that I was right in tagging you- something that I am careful not to use frequently. You opened so many new ideas with this comment. The example of a adult riding the bicycle living in the illusion he is being supported when in reality he/she is not is tremendously of value. I know of some MDs use similar approaches to heal their patient. You leave me with so much to think about. I expect you to write a buzz on this paradox. All you need is just to expand your comment a little. I wonder what Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic would comment as she started this lovely exchange of ideas. This is an example of concrete that really enforces.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #102

#155
Thank you for the tag, opportunity and title Ali Anani added to the concept of resisting time when she wrote, "resisted the test of time is because Roman concrete had no reinforcing". It makes me ask; do we understand when to expect certain support or reinforcment and when not to, as well as how does time influence our expectations? Much to think about!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#154
You know Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic shall have something to say here. Brilliant you are Lada. I do appreciate your reinforcing comment, but truly without weakening us.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #100

#148
Phil, your observation about the reinforcement steel and its ductility is correct. But since you have referred to my last comment where I mentioned Roman concrete I need to say that steel also reduces the durability of concrete because of the corrosion issue that causes the concrete decay. One of the reasons why the ancient structures I mentioned in the comment have resisted the test of time is because Roman concrete had no reinforcing (besides the mixture of ingredients that that have helped concrete to resist microcracking). About metaphor, I think it is used to illustrate a concept or an idea and it doesn’t need to be concrete. Some properties of concrete can be used to describe relationship between people. You continue to amaze me with the wisdom of Chung King. 🙂 I’ll try to “find” another one related to this subject.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #99

#148
Phil, your observation about the reinforcement steel and its ductility is correct. But since you have referred to my last comment where I mentioned Roman concrete, I need to say that steel also reduces the durability of concrete because of the corrosion issue that causes the concrete decay. One of the reasons why the antient structures I mentioned in the comment have resisted the test of time is because Roman concrete had no reinforcing (besides the mixture of ingredients that that have helped concrete to resist microcracking). About metaphor, I think it is used to illustrate a concept or an idea and it doesn’t need to be concrete. Some properties of concrete can be used to describe relationship between people. You continue to amaze me with the wisdom of Chung King. 🙂 I’ll try to “find” another one related to this subject.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#149
I Sara Jacobovici- I agree with you as based on my personal experiences. You wrote " Metaphors combine certain qualities of the actual object or concept described and combines with other qualities to provoke a different point of view{ and this reflects exactly my experiences with metaphors. I wonder if we can even live without metaphors for we have a natural tendency to using them. I understand they can be limiting if we stick to one metaphor and don't realize this is a dynamic process. We need to improve our metaphors along the way. Yes, it is a step by step process; yet it wors for me. In your last buzz you related our ability of imagination to metamorphic thinking. I wonder what Phil Friedman would comment. His comment revealed very solid knowledge on concrete and I guess the equations shall be easy for him to understand and reflect.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#148
I enjoy opposing opinions with solid reasoning. Your reasoning and statement Phil Friedman is declared very clearly in your comment " but to say the use of a metaphor is a literary device of very transient value". This has been a paradox for me for metaphors of transient values helped me improve my understanding, imagining and approaching an issue with fresh thinking. I used more than four metaphors to understand leadership. Each metaphor helped me move one step forward and then inspired the next metaphor to repeat the cycle again. That the metaphor was transient meant that I kept asking questions and was not staying in the comfort zone of finding one working metaphor. May be for visualization metaphors have been of great help to advance my knowledge.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#147
What I like bout your comments dear Tausif Mundrawala is they give us fresh air to think freshly. Your comment has no similar as you approach the discussion from new angles. I enjoyed your comment and the growth model of relationship as depicted in the first line of your comment. Greatly appreciated my friend.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #95

#148
Always love to hear from you Phil Friedman. I like how you think and how you write. I learn from your perspective. I hope that you will pardon me for saying that the use of metaphors are not as concrete as you may be interpreting. Metaphors combine certain qualities of the actual object or concept described and combines with other qualities to provoke a different point of view. As a creative arts therapist, as one who enjoys the philosophical and is a self-confessed metaphor junkie, I offer the following quote from Aristotle: "The poet, being an imitator like a painter or any other artist, must of necessity imitate one of three objects - things as they were or are, things as they are said or thought to be, or things as they ought to be. The vehicle of expression is language - either current terms or, it may be, rare words or metaphors."

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

4 years ago #94

#146
#115 #143 I hope that you will pardon me for bringing up what is essentially a philosophical point, I am personally not a big fan of using metaphors and similes if one is seriously exploring critical concepts such as friendship. The reason is that the model (the metaphor or simile) may not adequately or properly "mirror" the concept under discussion, and so may lead one astray if one insists on likening the concept to the model. For example, the tensile strength of reinforced concrete is contributed primarily by the mild ductile (malleable) steel re-bar and mesh embedded in the cement and aggregate matrix. The matrix is itself mostly for contributing stiffness to the composite under compression, i.e., for supporting static loads, not pulling them along in a dynamic relationship. If the concrete matrix is asked to behave flexibly, it develops micro-cracks, which may be stopped by the reinforcing steel taking over the loads. But if the stress continues, and the micro-cracks grow to significant size and number, the matrix fails, leaving the steel reinforcing to accept all of the loading, which it may or may not be able to do. Perhaps this all makes sense when you are talking about the concept and not just the model, but then again it might not. My point is not to reject the use of a metaphor, but to say the use of a metaphor is a literary device of very transient value. It is not a pathway to Understanding unless the properties of the model are discovered to be isomorphic with those of that which is being modeled. I am reminded of the caution from the scrolls of Chung King, "Mistake not obscurity for depth of thought..." (The Wisdom of Chung King, circa 650 AD). Cheers to all!

Lada 🏡 Prkic

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #93

#115
I feel honoured by your comment Sara Jacobovici. The ultimate test of endurance of concrete is the test of time. The ancient structures like the Pantheon and the Colosseum made of Roman concrete has resisted more than 2000 years. The ultimate relationship test is also the test of time. We must learn to develop resistance as a form of self-protection to deal with the challenges and expectations in relationships. And resistance leads to durability for both the relationship and concrete.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#144
Any time and whenever convenient for you you publish @Deb Lange it shall be my pleasure to read and learn.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#142
You remind me of a friend who told me "you know it is difficult to remember all names. So, calling somebody a friend relieves me of the embarrassment of forgetting somebody's name". I assure you dear Mohammed Sultan I remember yours.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#140
Thank you @Deb Deb 🐝 Lange- no matter what trick I use, I failed to highlight your name to reflect my great appreciation of your comment. You bring a hugely important point when you write "And what is good on beBee is that we can share personal and professional and we can be our whole selves". You alert me to the reductionist approaches we have been taking that led us astray and fell completely short of understanding complexity. But now I realize from your comment that we use same reductionist approaches towards ourselves. Shall we ever then be able to understand us? This splitting issue is surely one of your forthcoming buzzes because you bring our attention to our ailing thinking and behaviors. I love your comment because it is an eye-opener and including the mind eye.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#135
But believe me feeling is sensing Aurorasa Sima. One sense leads to another. Yes, closeness has its unique smell and fragrance.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#134
Thank you dear @Mohammed Sultan- At least geographically you are close enough for us to meet in person and to cement our friendship. I hope so. Thank you for your ever continuing support and appreciation.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#133
@Deb Lange- when do I hope to be able to tag you? I hope beBee Team would do something. I "Trust Your Senses".

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#131
May be I do my waggle dance if ever I get the opportunity to meet with you in person Pascal Derrien. We need to breathe outside a predefined hive. Yes, and who wants to breathe the same air?

Pascal Derrien

Pascal Derrien

4 years ago #85

I use the term of social media acquaintances unless I have meet an individual face to face and then it moves to the somebody I know status :-) now I appreciate a lot of interaction and the interaction a lot but I think voids are simply a self preservation symptom of a need to breathe outside a pre-defined hive. Personally I don't really do hives I rather use the feed and producer time line you never too sure who you are going to bump into, now there are a few individuals that I would love to meet @ a ...hive fest :-)

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#129
With all honesty Aurorasa Sima I have all respect for your definition of friendship. With such sense who wouldn't like to be friendly with you? I was at home for for five weeks down with two terrible health problems. Few missed me, and many didn't. But the excuse is there. With the flow of so many buzzes and comments our disposable times are consumed. SOmetimes we miss a person without expressing it out. For example, I miss Anees Zaidi a lot. He isn't any more writing buzzes or commenting. Missing somebody is a sign of caring. I wish you more than 100% recovery. Just knowing that I failed to observe your absence made me feel bad. At least I care.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#126
Aurorasa Sima- I enjoy comments that tackle new aspects. While not being cynical, your comment made me think. I asked myself if calling virtual friends as friends I am being true with myself. The answer is yes. The mental connection through ideas and exchange of comments made some people much closer than few physical friends. The question then is can we build concrete friendship with people who are physically distant? Or, would meeting with virtual friends would actually lead to the opposite effect. I told you you got me thinking.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Aurorasa Sima- I enjoy comments that tackle new aspects. While not be cynical, your comment made me think. I asked myself if calling virtual friends as friends I am true with myself. The answer is yes. The mental connection through ideas and exchange of comments made some people much closer than even physical friends. The question then is can we build concrete friendship with people who are physically distant? Or, would meet with virtual friends would actually lead to the opposite effect I told you you got me thinking.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#124
Skilfully and powerfully you did dear David Navarro L\u00f3pez the image becomes very clear with no blurring. Blesses you are my friend.

David Navarro López

David Navarro López

4 years ago #80

#105
To your question "How about if the wall was like a trunk of a tree allowing water to go up and the quality of this water is contaminated with falsified values and emotions?" I believe Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic has already wonderfully explained it. A well based and constructed relationship can be as hard to break as a nuclear bomb proof bunker. Knowing that human mind is the most complex item in the universe, which becomes to be much more complex if you combine with another human to build a relationship, we can only attempt to build them with the proper and highest human values, discarding contaminations like selfishness as a needful first step. Using love as a basic ingredient, for example, would have subsequent actions like empathy, needful to provide an "elastic bonding", to resist pressures without breaking, while giving the other enough freedom within the relationship to find his own way of doing. A habit of kind actions would appear too, so whenever misunderstanding would appear, it would resist cracking, due to the proven trajectory of good will, which would make us discard in first place wrong motivations hidden behind the misunderstanding. I am not reading this on a book. I am just mentioning some of the ingredients which strengthen the relationship we do have since some time, no matter difference of opinions, culture or background. I am sure you will agree that adding more "good" ingredients to our relationship will only make it stronger, and while adding them, we are not letting any available space for contaminants, getting it "compacted" as Lada says.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#117
Dear Praveen Raj Gullepalli proved provocative to my mind in very positive and inquiring ways.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I appreciate your comment greatly dear Sara Jacobovici wrote made lots of sense to me. But your elaboration created even a better one. I am happy with the discussions because they energized my mind and heart.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #77

#112
Love your comment Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic for this buzz, this opportunity and for the tremendous discussion that it has generated.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#112
Thank you Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic and being a civil engineer you are in a favorable position to testify. Yes, your comment reflects the main idea of the buzz by drawing analogy between "concrete and real human relationships". I am glad because the message reached you the way I intended to. Deeply grateful to you

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#111
Thank you dear Sara Jacobovici. I try my best to explain a situation and then let readers give their feedback,. For example, in this buzz I questioned the value of common "wisdoms" such as let us cement our relationship. However; I received few comments and a private message indicating that I try to impose my opinion. I wanted to wash away this idea. I understand the complexity of the topics we discuss here. All I want is to help each other find a way to crack a cemented problem or issue. So, it is gratifying to read your appraisal and I am happy that people of your quality don't see me as self-imposing or even self-promoting bee.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #74

I was attracted by the post title because I am a civil engineer who see concrete everywhere. 🙂 For me, to cement a relationship, or to build a relationship on a concrete ground means simply to make it strong and firm like cement or concrete. But to make concrete that will be durable and resist the test of time it is necessary to make a proper mixture and to carry out a proper placing and curing. When concrete does not get compacted well it results in porosity and weak concrete, and then in honeycombing and voids in concrete. In the social context, this means that we need to build relationships without the voids that could cause weakening of the bonds between people. Ali Anani, your post is a nicely drawn parallel between concrete and real human relationships.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #73

#83
Thank you Ali Anani for alerting me to @Deb Lange's comment. Yes, I definitely want to look at resistance as a sense or the relationship between senses and feelings. As I consider us sensory beings, it makes "sense" that our feelings and dynamics are sensory based. But when does a sense transform into something else, like a feeling/emotion or idea? I look forward to getting back to you both soon. PS Dear Dr. Ali, I am not sure what you meant when you wrote that you might be imposing yourself on others but I cannot imagine that this is taking place. I consider you a thinker and an observer of life. As far as I'm concerned, you provide opportunities, not imposition.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#109
This is a glorious point dear Mohammed Sultan. The Golden Circle core question is why? Now, you put a damn good reason when to avoid asking why. As you wrote "Asking why reveals disagreement and inconsistency in views.In business,marketers are faced with such verbal attacks or complaints or communication mix-ups by their customers that create the crack in the company's relationship with its customers". So, why questions can be a major source of breaking cemented relationships. This is a great point and merits much more than a comment.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#107
I love your comment my dear friend Steve Brady. I too would love to meet with you for even days to learn from you as well. May be one day I surprise you and do. I wonder if you have read the comments. The comments cover some "heated discussions on the flow. In your comment you wrote " I am currently reading a book in which the author points out that even each of us individually, our relationship with our self / selves is a fluid "becoming" rather than a static "become". Would you elaborate more? How about social networks branching into semi-rigid or even rigid structures. In low density networks fluids flow easily, but in very dense one would they? You leave me with lots to think about.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Harvey Lloyd responded to this buzz and comments by writing a great buzz that is worthy of readers' times. I urge readers to read the buzz on "Challenging Today's Social Norms" https://www.bebee.com/producer/@harvey-lloyd/challenging-today-s-social-norms It is for serious readers, but again is worthy of pondering on.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#104
Beautifully expressed dear David Navarro L\u00f3pez. You added a new element to the discussion. Your insights open new windows for us to see the world. I haven't thought of your perspective, but I love it. We need to know the quality of the concrete we use to build the wall as well as its surroundings. How about if the wall was like a trunk of a tree allowing water to go up and the quality of this water ic contaminated with falsified values and emotions? You leave me with a lot to think about.

David Navarro López

David Navarro López

4 years ago #68

Thank you for mentioning me for your very interesting buzz dear Ali. I don t see anything wrong on building concrete relationships. The problem comes when one doesn t know some basic and technical rules to be observed. As in a real wall, you need to evaluate the weight of teh wall and the external forces like winds, soil, or eventual earthquakes it can happen, and then provide the needful expansion gaps to avoid cracking by compresion or torsion. Same thing with relationships, the more critical mass of it and the more possible external forces it can influence it, teh more flexible and or bigger gaps are to be put in place.

David Navarro López

David Navarro López

4 years ago #67

Thank you for mentioning me for your very interesting buzz dear Ali. I don t see anything wrong on building concrete relationships. The problem comes when one doesn t know some basic and technical rules to be observed. As in a real wall, you need to evaluate the weight and the external forces like winds, soil, or eventual earthquakes it can happen, and then provide the needful

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#101
We are on the same boat dear Lisa Gallagher. I miss too some of your buzzes for the same reasons. I wish we had more disposable times to enjoy all the great contributions here. However; not all people have the same degree of tolerance and this has caused the generation of some gaps in otherwise I thought of as concrete connections. The flow of communications then stops. This is unfortunate. I appreciate your understanding and sharing of this buzz.

Lisa Gallagher

Lisa Gallagher

4 years ago #65

Excellent observations Ali Anani. There are gaps at times. I can say with all sincerity, if I miss posts of those i enjoy, it has nothing to do with the person. I use social media at odd hours and I seem to miss posts of those I may frequent. I also try to read alot of new articles which may seem as though I'm igoring people ive grown to care about and thier writing. Its my hope those who have known me for some time also know that once I feel I've made a concrete relationship, I value it, even if it appears I'm not always present. Very nice topic and well written buzz, my friend!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

-you wrote a buzz contradicting this buzz without referring to this buzz. I have the courage to give the link to your buzz so that readers may see both sides of the story. Your buzz carries the title "Why relationships must be fluid or they are destined to fail" https://www.bebee.com/producer/@max-carter/why-relationships-must-be-fluid-or-they-are-destined-to-fail I share my comment I wrote on your buzz: @Max🐝 J. CarterI would first provide a link to the on-going discussions so that readers may capture the full discussions. This is unfair to project your own views and discard about 100 comments, most of which didn't agree with you. Just one question- doesn flow happen without a carrier. Water flows in pipes. Emotions flow in what? Emotions flow like water I agree. Emotions on beBee flows because beBee has a platform to carry the flow. What if the carrying medium is contaminated? Why do we use terms like building concrete relations? I don't dispute the flow of emotions, but what contaminates emotions? If they flow naturally and without being exposed to any contaminant then we see-eye-to eye? Is this the case?

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#95
Deb \ud83d\udc1d Helfrich. I kindly invite Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee to consider your valuable suggestion "We are all familiar with the nested comment structure used elsewhere where the replies to a comment are nested in order and indented underneath a comment. It tends to keep phases of the conversation ordered a bit more, in my opinion". I couldn't agree more with you Deb as many times I have to scroll down the comments to ensure I credit a commenter later on. Also, this way we may stay more focused.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#97
You spoke my heart dear . I appreciate your comment and compliments. You fuel me with such recognition and I am truly humbled. As for the beBee I say it has successfully provided a concrete platform on which our emotions flow. The concrete could vary in form. It could be a pipeline for the flow of our ideas. The flow if pure and honest shall ensure the concrete pipe shall not crack or corrode. With a comment of appreciation and encouragement I assure you the pipe and flow shall be there for long times to come.

David B. Grinberg

David B. Grinberg

4 years ago #61

Thanks for alerting me to this buzz, Ali, and regrets for my belated reply. It's telling that "belated" on social media means nearly 100 comments have already been made in about 20 hours (per this post). I believe this is a positive testament on your wonderful writing. Once again, you offer a profound, thought-provoking, enlightening, and well written buzz which I believe is meritorious. You have an amazing ability to open our eyes, hearts and minds to view the world with a sharper focus, both online and off, and serve as a catalyst for deep thinking on issues of importance. And while I haven't had time, unfortunately, to read the long thread of comments below, I can say this without reservation: beBee is fortunate to have a "beautiful mind" likes yours blessing us with words of wisdom and so-called "food for thought." Thanks for all you do, Ali, and please keep buzzing!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#91
Antoinette Capasso-Backdahl- It is a mutual feeling as I sense my joy flying over the place in responding to your out-of-heart comment. I appreciate your comment and the lovey meanings it carries.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#90
At least I can get your name highlighted Deb \ud83d\udc1d Helfrich. Thank you for the explanation which resolves my puzzle. Yes, it is not working for the name of @Deb Lange and her name isn't showing in the selection list. I hope this issue would be solved soon by the beBee Team.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#89
A similar opinion was voiced out by Harvey Lloyd?

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#87
Deb \ud83d\udc1d Helfrich- It worked backwards Deb. What I did I copied your highlighted name and then started deleting the last letters of your surname and then it was possible to highlight your name.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#82
Praveen Raj Gullepalli- thank you and no bee can build a solid bridge alone; it is people like you that makes this possible.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

@Deb Lange- besides the issue of names not highlighting, I invite Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee to read this lovely part of your comment "What we are attempting to do here in BeBee is to listen, read, and share ideas with one another without necessarily agreeing with everything that is said".Yes, I couldn't agree more with you.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#80
@Deb Lange- I only wish these efforts would succeed. You have a chance with disruptive thinking to do it. For now, I dare say that the Rule of 20/80 exists. It has been there for long times. That few have wealth and the majority are deprived is a source for the 4-cycle to continue. Disparity leads to the generation of big societal gaps and destabilization. Having voids in different sizes in providing equal opportunities to men and women is surely a source for generating gaps and again destabilization of any society. We need to level gaps or make them as uniform as possible. This should take us out of the gravity of the 4-cycle. Thank you @Deb Lange for bringing great discussion issues to the table.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#79
@Deb Lange (again, names aren't highlighting and I wish beBee to look into this issue)- I am eagerly looking forward to read your forthcoming buzz. You comment is so important and I invite Sara Jacobovici to read it. Sara discussed and revealed why she considers knowledge as a sense. Now, masterfully Deb reveals "The resistance gives a sense of power and autonomy over ones life even if it is futile". Resistance produces sense. This is a pioneering ideas by saying that some feelings generate senses. Or, some senses generate other hidden senses. A lot think about. I reveal here that in writing my buzzes I try to leave issues open for discussions because social studies aren't deterministic one. However; I realize now that also I have the sense I might be imposing myself on others. I hope to read your buzz soonest @Deb Lange

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#77
I love your deep thinking dear Praveen Raj Gullepalli. With engagement, understanding and patience I managed to build a solid cemented wall with you and the like of you. We discussed actions but your elaboration here deserves highlighting "We tend to destroy relationships by analysing them too deeply. Affections spin their own web of obligation". I better stop analysing. Great comment

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#75
I am so glad that Harvey Lloyd. I know and value her association.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #50

#73
I agree the intentions in social media are much different than reading them in person. Having made several trips across the USA on a motorcycle i have met some awesome people. Their intentions to join a journey and share were clear. Social media lacks the understanding of all the physical aspects of people in person engaged. I treat social media as a conference we learn together and we go our separate ways only to return from time to time. But i guess i might be the anomaly, i seek nothing from social media except the experiences of meeting new and different perspectives, such as Ali Anani and so on. I have nothing to sell and no job to get. So i enjoy the BeBee experience with no expectations. I can now add you to that experience, Thanks

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Thank you dear for your elaborate comment. Yes, it does take time and energy to build relations with meaning. This is why I grow my relations rather slowly because of time constraints. I know there are few bees whom I care to read their contributions regularly because they don't repeat themselves and challenge my mind. There are few others who relax me with their musical contributions. I care for both. However; would I be able to do the same if I have many authors to follow regularly? I doubt it. Building relationship require caring and also understanding from my partners. If I fail to read two consecutive buzzes then I may be accused of negligence. In fact, this happened and was the starting void in some relations. SOmetimes, growing too fast can be detrimental. I hope that beBee will continue in selectively using hives as gathering hubs of similar minds. At least I may focus on people sharing few affinity hives with me. Yes, maintaining concrete relations can be quite challenging. Thank you for your comment allowed me to vent out some of my own experiences.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#71
Yes, it is an open forum. Closed systems and including closed forums are bound to end up in chaos. In contrast, open systems self-organize and new thinking emerge. This is the whole idea dear Harvey Lloyd and I am glad that you see the forum an open one.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #47

#69
I do not hide behind the backseat comment but rather respect the journey that i am an invited guest. I agree with your sentiments in this comment also. Ali Anani gives me invitation as you do to share the ride and appreciate the flushing out of ideas in such an open forum of understanding whose journey i was invited. I have met strong personalities that appeared unscorched or beaten by the elements. But even their stone turns to rubble as we evolve. I have witnessed the tuff parent melt with a grandchild or the passing of their own parents. The world view changes each day the larger question is can we follow. Max's fluid conversation is not lost on me.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#69
That is my point Sara Jacobovici comment. The beauty here is that I don't have to say why I tag you because you figure it out perfectly well yourself. Thank You

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #45

#67
#68 Never a back seat Harvey Lloyd, Harvey's quote, ""But what is stone today can be rubble tomorrow.", brings me full circle to the first comment I posted regarding the quality of the cement or building material. Some stones are able to withstand whatever nature throws at them.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I am sure that Sara Jacobovici as much as I did. "But what is stone today can be rubble tomorrow"- what beauty this is! A lot to think about from this shining comment. Life is a process of choices- just you keep me deep in the waters of your wisdom.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #43

#62
Ali Anani etched in stone is another way we can describe the exploration. I agree. I enjoy the review, research and thoughts of many and love to tag along their journey. I also have to realize though that life is a process of our choices. These choices are refined with time and participations with great minds that explore the core issues. But what is stone today can be rubble tomorrow. New information, frontal lobe discipline in understanding both of ya'lls post from time to time evolve my thinking. The relationship and its core fundamentals though don't change. Your fluidity and etched in stone comment Sara. Thank you for allowing me a back seat view of your journey. Please excuse the verboseness.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #42

#56
I agree the discussion certainly got verbose in nature but this is merely a communication style. I do have very concrete values of existence. I am fluid within them and see the nature of @Max Carter and his understanding of the topic. The concrete for me is within the values. I can share a journey up till the point action gets ready to take place. Philosophy and action within the determinations is two very different things. This is where we meet the concrete of each other's value sets. I appreciate your words of drawing the conversation into a more productive sense, Sara Jacobovici

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I rarely tag my bees friends, but this time I feel the urge to invite Lisa Gallagher is affectionate to metaphors from nature.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#62
I think Harvey Lloyd

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #39

#61
This is a perfect place for me to respond to you @Max J. Cater by saying that although I understand what you are saying, I do not see our relationship with our history and nature in the same light. Thanks for the discussion.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #38

#60
My gut reaction Ali Anani is that the synchronicity between us is another example of a solid and secure aspect of our connection. Synchronicity itself is fluid, but our being open to the experience is "etched in stone".

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#58
This is a perfect example of synchronicity between you Sara Jacobovici and I. I am just perplexed. Is synchronicity built on concrete understandings between us? I need to find out the answer.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#56
I encourage us all, I am including myself, to stay focused on the subject at hand and not to template our comments across the board.-this is your call Sara Jacobovici and I am urging myself to stay focused. Thank you and I appreciate the timing and quality of your call.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #35

Part 2/2 Synchronicity strikes again Ali Anani when I saw your comment. @Max J. Carter, you write, "To me i see it more as tilling the soil on occasion to promote growth instead cement." There are times and places where it is perfectly appropriate to establish a strong foundation upon which to build. I see this reflected in what Harvey says when he writes, "Concrete is poured so that activities can exist upon it. The concrete itself is not fluid but the activities are." Humans create and build. We have a myriad of materials available to us to support our myriad needs.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #34

#31
#33 Part 1/2 First let me say, gentlemen, @Max Carter, Harvey Lloyd, I am experiencing a frustration that intelligent adults should not have to experience when engaged in a discussion. I encourage us all, I am including myself, to stay focused on the subject at hand and not to template our comments across the board. Yes, we have a perspective that wraps itself around our meanings, ideas and experiences, but this is the part that represents fluidity. We can't afford to be concrete in our reactions to whatever we are reading and respond in the same manner no matter what. And finally, it is perfectly legitimate to come to a respectful understanding that we disagree and to stop trying to convince the other of a right and wrong way of seeing things.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#53
Resistance is a quality that is often protective, not necessarily destructive.This quote from your comment Sara Jacobovici is a buzz on its own. How many people look at resistance negatively and destructively? Yes, resistance could be a form of self-defense. This is deep thinking.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #32

#25
Hi @Max J. Carter. I would like to focus on 2 of your statements: 1. "Anything that resists change is inevitably destroyed by change anyway." and 2. "My intent is to get outside the box and expand the view and awareness that leads to expansion of consciousness." I'll start with #2. From my experience, the posts, opinions and discussions in which I have participated are specifically those that are open to seeing outside the box; not to draw us back into our own boxes. That is one reason I read your comments, to see another point of view. #1. The materials which go into building edifices or relationships have a real function of establishing a solid and supportive structure. From my perspective flexibility and adaptation are the criteria for change. Resistance is a quality that is often protective, not necessarily destructive.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#51
Yes, they sing out of the nest and very politely you expressed it Mohammed Sultan.Sometimes it could be the whoop of the crow.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#44
I am in agreement with you Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #29

#42
I would be interested in the basis of your decision to be "out". I felt that we were being fluid in our discussions about a concrete theory.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I genuinely invite dear Milos Djukic to moderate here because of his "concrete" background in these topics. I hope his time would allow him to share his thoughts. We need them.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #27

#38
Again i am seeing that you offer up flow that appears to be concrete to others. Help me understand that if your flow is concrete to someone else, then doesn't concrete then exist? Again the duality. This inside a discussion that i believe in fundamental principal we agree.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#40
WOW- this is an incredible extension to my comment just above yours dear Harvey Lloyd. We almost posted the same time. Amazing!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#38
Again, I respect your perspective. However; I am being practical. A social platform will become concrete-like. People are leaving LI because they find the concrete cracking under their feet. My perspective is how to make the unavoidable emerging concrete-like platform sustainable. You propose a different approach, which I respect . However; the question becomes can the soil be soil at all times? That is another question. For me, the soil is a different metaphor than concrete and it doesn't answer many phenomena such as the emerging voids in social network structures. Our perspectives are different because we use different metaphors.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #24

#35
Your metaphor is one i identify with. But i was using the concrete metaphor to describe the strength of relationships and you are using fertile soil, same thing. Your fertile soil must have concrete concepts of understanding what fertile means. Wisdom is built upon that which is logical first. Then wisdom is applied. If the outcome was unforeseen then the wisdom was bad, along with the logic. We must rethink (logic) and adapt to new wisdom (Evolve) As soon as soil becomes fertile then it can flood, become rodent infested or developed by an outsider. The metaphor is not singular but rather describes the evolving understanding that happens in relationships. They evolve because they exist within the boundaries of solid understanding of those boundaries.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#37
I have no answer then - Wow as your name is highlighted this time!!!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#31
That is another approach and perspective @Max J. Carter. This is not the main theme of this buzz. You know this very well.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #21

#28
I would say yes to the question. Self preservation is a part of the human experience. But the basis of the answer is probably more important. What denotes poor concrete? Each of us must measure this for ourselves through our own life narrative. I believe the larger topic, is poor concrete is poor to me, but one of strength for others. Can we allow this happen from our own unique perspective? No i don't like broccoli. But i know folks that could exist on a diet of that alone. The topic is a broad one that has many tentacles. In social media though we must be capable of communicating with other opinions and perspectives. Challenging poor concrete in this context is a challenging position. It may not be for me and i don't believe i should challenge the presenter based on my own perspective. I can explore anything without agreeing. I can only agree with something from my own perspective. Sometimes this perspective is limiting, but its mine and i have to live with myself. Not fun sometimes.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#30
This is my favorite wisdom of the day from your comment Harvey Lloyd on this buzz.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#30
No Harvey Lloyd, as I have been in similar situations before with @Max J. Carter. I wrote twice to Max "we agreed to disagree". I hope this shall not lead to the cracking of our good intentions. I can't highlight the name of Max as it appears he unfollowed me. Is this a beginning of a forthcoming crack? May be we need to vibrate the concrete.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #18

#25
Again you speak of self and the relationship itself where two or more are gathered. We can be fluid within the concepts of certain concrete understandings. Even with your son you have objectives, you may be fluid in meeting them or guiding them away from boundaries. I agree with your taking the title and extending it to discuss fluidity. I took the post and the deeper meanings of the experience i was reading and attempted to explore with the author. Both concepts are worth exploring. But the realization that concrete fundamentals within relationships are necessary to create cracks, overcome and develop a deeper meaning must be acknowledged before we can explore fluidity. We are as fluid as our intentions may allow within a larger group. Concrete is poured so that activities can exist upon it. The concrete itself is not fluid but the activities are. The higher the activity of fluidness the larger the concrete must be to sustain the activities. Concrete=trust, shared goals, inclusion, diversity etc..... Consciousness can not be expanded within a bubble. Our perceptions and our walk in life involves others. So consciousness can not exclude them. I have read many of your statements and posts and you elude to this fact. But here you discuss the fluid aspects of consciousness without this tether. Again i sense a duality in trying to understand your logic. Ali Anani please forgive Max and I if we have hijacked your post.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#16
Dear Mohammed Sultan- it took me a while to respond to your comment because it merits deep thinking. You wrote "Those selfish people who try to ride the peak trend and put others in the trough are either playing with the roles or exploiting the friendly relationship to form axis of influence.This polarizing effect may lead to weight-imbalance and cracks in the body of the ship that could sink it from the top". Unfortunately, I have to agree with you and what you wrote is truthful. You highlight a great point of behaviors that lead to void-forming and early cracking of relationship. You remind me of a slideshare post that I wrote a while ago titled " Twitter Selfishness Index" http://www.slideshare.net/hudali15/twitter-selfishness-index Obviously, I am in agreement with you and sadly so. I wish I could differ on this sad behavior of some people.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

@25 I am not arguing the validity of your logic. I am just asking if it is inevitable to run into situations where fluidity may be lost because of the nature of the system and how it behaves. I am also raising awareness to our continued use of terms such as cementing relationship if the cement is of low quality.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#22
This part of your comment amazed me dear debasish majumder "all female workers, inherently contain the element to be aligned concretely, and remain busy unknowingly to their respected work, the very basic essence of their existence"!ALigned concretely to produced real concrete honeycomb structure. This is unlike the honeycomb structure building concrete shows which is a sign of something going wrong. Great point

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#21
I tend to your side Harvey Lloyd as evidenced from my previous comment addressed to @Max J. Carter

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#20
Der - i am not disputing your approach and dealing with your son. I just wanted to highlight the fact that and social structure when it grows it needs to be treated differently. Look at the density of social network maps on the internet. Some of them are very dense meaning that most of possible linkages have been filled. In contrast, low-density social networks have many unfilled linkages. The behavior of dense on es is not the same as those of light ones. It is a fact and need to modify our approach accordingly. To say that the structure is unimportant negates reality.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #12

#20
I would disagree this post is about relationships just as you have introduced family as a metaphor, business and many other social setting exist where the concrete is poured and cracked. Although the title may have stated the facts of avoidance i was offering up you cant avoid the process. This discussion has created a concrete. Two slabs to be precise. You come from a different perspective than myself. This is nether good or bad but a discussion about perspectives. Fluidity in seeing ones self i believe is an accurate discipline and understanding. Its when it breaks out of self into the group that we hit concrete that requires maintenance and understanding. I am glad you have found methods with your son of giving direction. You look for flow, and a simple reminder of the concrete values you have set as expectations or performance. Interestingly your opening statement established some form of concrete within the discussion by diverting our discussion and restating the title. What was the objective here? Were you redirecting my fluid thoughts of the post to your concrete concepts? I sense a duality in your comment that doesn't fit within your framework of fluid thinking.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #11

#17
"...we need good individuals who interact correctly to have a solid and high quality concrete." Well said Ali Anani.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #10

#11
Unfortunately life is not a rock concert and performance objectives is what leaders explore and set. Control is a strong word, and in your application i don't think we share the same definition of the word. In leadership allowing folks to free range sounds good until you realize that they have lost focus and not progressing in the direction needed for success. Life is always disappointing. This has been so for many 1000's of years. Those who typically live the exciting life of their choice are doing so because others are not enjoying theirs. This is not to say that i don't enjoy my life, i do. But i also realize that others under my charge have expectations of their paycheck, they expect me to guide the firm to success so they can prosper. This calls for concrete relationships that they can lean on, not necessarily like, but know that the concrete exists. Consider the rich dad in Wonka's chocolate factory. She was the epitome of free and fluid ideas of the dad not providing concrete relationships. Someone has to captain the ship they must take the whole of the processes and provide concrete focus on direction. How they captain is open for debate, the fact that they have to do it, is not.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#13
I believe you deserve a bigger Bravo than mine Sara Jacobovici. What is based on inferior material will give an inferior structure. That is one important side of the equation that I left out for the sake of brevity. I am so glad that you highlighted this point. However; workmanship may misuse a correct material in placing it and maintaining the structure in which this material was used. Yes, the two sides of the coin must be correct. It is the same with building relationship- we need good individuals who interact correctly to have a solid and high quality concrete.

Sara Jacobovici

Sara Jacobovici

4 years ago #8

Bravo Ali Anani, another valuable chapter to your insights into what makes relationships, people to people and business to business, work effectively and "build" to their potential. My only contribution would be in extending the metaphor you use is to mention that the greatest architectural designs and blueprints can not withstand a poor quality of material that goes into the building. Unfortunately so many examples of corruption when money for quality cement is pocketed and the remaining funds is "poured" into inferior quality. So many cracks, in so many places appear soon after the building goes up. Trust and security can be included in the list of losses as a result. A relationship, person to person or business to business, must use the best quality of cement in the building of that solid relationship.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#11
Harvey Lloyd highlighted. Like polymeric chains when they cross-link they become less fluid and more rigid. This is how things happen. When this happens we need to deal with the new reality. I wish that we could keep our relations in a state of flow, but this could be a dream. Once we entangle with with different interests with other and the gel solidifies we need to have a different perspective. In essence, I like the spirit of your comment; in reality this could be hard to achieve.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#8
You said it perfectly well dear Harvey Lloyd "Concrete fundamentals are needed to focus the fluid in a direction". This is perfect as it reflects my intention in writing this buzz. Yes, fluidity becomes progressively less as we build more contacts. The concrete metaphor is truly extensible to human concrete relationships.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #5

#5
"I" can be fluid, but once i add another human the fluidity tends to shape into concrete. The relationship is what Ali was referring not the individual. The shared experience is based on solid fundamentals of understanding within the relationship. Should i become fluid within the relationship this is what causes the cracks in the relationship/maintenance. Although being fluid may go well for the individual, in larger groups where performance objectives exist, fluidity is hard to control. Concrete fundamentals are needed to focus the fluid in a direction.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#5
You are very smart . You know that concrete doesn't flow like water does and this is the reason why concrete is full of air voids. It is inevitable to have voids. This is why we need to agitate concrete to reduce air voids. May be the problem is embedded in the flow.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#3
Thank you dear Harvey Lloyd. Yes, we need maintenance for our concrete-like relationships. Distractions from too many notifications is a challenge that we all face. Without having a solid concrete ground extending our relations and ties with other bees can me a source of problems and weakening of existing ones.

Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

4 years ago #2

Ali Anani hope all is well with you. Your post is challenging my mind again. The concrete metaphor is a good one and represents for me the ever changing maintenance we as humans must perform in maintaining relationships. Not a bad thing, but my mother one time asked if you can have to many friends. The question started a discussion about the actions of friendship and hours in the day. Social media has added a whole new level of relationships. I can't imagine getting 100's of notifications per day, if not more and carry on real life relationships. Good to read your thoughts this AM.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#1
- this time I agree completely with your comment. As you wrote "What if we abandon the rules and think of it of opportunities to find learning and growth"? This is a great point and I am with you. Learning and growth is the way to go.

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