Pairing Repelling Comments

Pairing Repelling Comments

My shared buzz on LinkedIn invited many comments, some of which took totally different directions than the comments on the original shared buzz on beBee. I mean my buzz titled "Reverse Strategic Thinking". The discussions were highly illuminating. However; one commenter wrote comments on LinkedIn shooting down the title and content. Harvey Lloyd responded very wisely to the criticism and so did Dr. Ali H Higgi. In fact, Dr. Higgi wrote another comment "If discussion's participants - commenters - behave in a natural, unbiased and positive manner with a clear goal to add value, for sure ideas can be enhanced significantly and likely to be transformed to even better ones. Ali Anani, PhD- You are the master of making a complex concept easily comprehendible. Do not let negative feed-backs curtail your generous contribution, they are highly appreciated. Do not stop"! It was this comment that propelled me to write this buzz.

I welcome negative ideas. I represent them with an arrow pointing downwards. I apply the principle of pairing. Negative ideas are a source of magnetism as we may pair them with upwards pointing ideas. So, are negative comments as they are a source of magnetism- only if we can pair them with positive comments- that is upwards pointing ones.

The idea of pairing negative to positive or downward pointing arrow with an upward directed one a miraculous idea may emerge. This is practiced in cooking wherein the idea of negative pairing is applied. Asian chefs try to avoid using foods that match in terms of flavor. It is not β€œnegative food pairing” when no food pairing actually occur. I think the theory behind this is like Yin and Yang, where you have two things that are totally different, but still goes together in the sense that one enhances the other’s good aspects and covers its less desirable qualities, so that they can still be harmonious without blending. Pairing the negative with positive can lead to better-quality food. Likewise; I view the pairing of negative comments with positive ones. They need not be in harmony, but still they may enhance the flavor of each other.

We may extend the same concept to emotions. When we go through downward facing feelings because of a loss of a beloved person or whatever we find ourselves in depression, sadness, anger or whatever negative feelings we may have. This is the opportunity to pair these negative feelings with upward pointing feelings to create the magnetic result of this pairing. When we are deep in sorrow for losing a beloved person we need to pair this feeling with the happy memories of the deceased ones. This point is proven by the experience of my friend Edward Lewellen which he shared in his brilliant book "The 90-Second Mind Manager". I was privileged to write the foreword for this book in which Edward reports how he helped himself get out from the grievance of losing his young daughter.

Remember the simple formula. Look for pairing. In downtimes and feel sad, bad, desertedΒ or whatever look for the pairing event that make you feel positive. This is your antidote.
Ali Anani, PhD

Now, there are comments that can't be paired. If I write a comment to somebody, and I hope not, stating that his buzzes are worth nothing then the best I find I to stay away and keep the distance. I fail to find to pair such comments and the best I can do is leave them alone.


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Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#178
You said it beautifully and to the point Deb \ud83d\udc1d Helfrich in your comment and this line must be highlighted "is a chance for self-aggrandizement". Social platforms are for interactions that lead to spontaneous self-organizing. All acts negating this definition are undesirable and mostly when platforms are used for expanding self. You are very wise my friend.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I summed up my thoughts in a new buzz https://www.bebee.com/producer/@ali-anani/to-be-right-you-have-to-have-someone-to-say-you-are-wrong#c26

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#175
I want first to alert Harvey Lloyd for obviously he is a sharpmind. "But that attempt has to be mutual with openness"- I am preparing a buzz using a new metaphor on how to deal with this issue and I find your comment stimulating and to the point. I shall tag you when I publish.

Milos Djukic

Milos Djukic

3 years ago #157

#173
Thank you CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit! I'm a great admirer of your writing.

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

3 years ago #156

#168
Hi Milos Djukic those dastardly people at Youtube would not let the link play in Canada - but this one works here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m0AKJMGxwpE - the creative interjection of this song provides another perspective. Perspective glorious perspective I raise my glass to that whenever and where-ever whenever anyone anywhere tickles my perspectives - thank you Milos !

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

3 years ago #155

#168
Hi @Milos those dastardly people at Youtube would not let the link play in Canada - but this one works here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m0AKJMGxwpE - the creative interjection of this song provides another perspective. Perspective glorious perspective - thank you Milos !

Milos Djukic

Milos Djukic

3 years ago #154

#170
Just like yours, Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee, my dear friend.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#167
No wonder you got more than 20000 views dear Milos Djukic. Your words are filled with love and so they reach us easily.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#163
Kudos to you as well for laying the four simple rules of behaving while commenting. I truly appreciate your thorough understanding of the issue. Very rarely we are 100% sure and yet many comments turn to be conclusive in the eyes of the commenter. If so, then we don't need to exchange comments because we know. This is far from the truth. Yes, one person on LI expressed his view that all my buzzes are worthless in his first, and hopefully last, comment. How dare a commenter make such conclusion when he has only read one buzz (and I doubt he read comprehensively). He reminds me if of a similar situation. Give a student one point to draw a straight line!!! Second- how did he have the courage to say that the hundreds of commenters who had different views than him be all wrong. Either this person is above all of us to see what nobody has seen or he is and I leave the description to the reader. We need always to leave a crack in the door open. This is possible by saying, I have an alternative idea, how about considering and so on. You allowed me to vent out some of my feelings dear Jean.

Milos Djukic

Milos Djukic

3 years ago #151

Songwriters: GORE, MARTIN LEE Enjoy The Silence lyrics Β© EMI Music Publishing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGSKrC7dGcY

Milos Djukic

Milos Djukic

3 years ago #150

One word can make a miracle or a misery, similarly as a love. Therefore, words and Love makes the world go round.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I appreciate your contributions to these discussion and keeping them alive with your balanced comments Jerry Fletcher

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #148

#164
I agree, Jerry Fletcher. I've repeated my own position numerous times, and will not do it again. I cannot, however, help observing how many commenters have expressed amazement at the length of this discussion, which stands at nearly 165 comments and replies. Certainly not the longest on beBee, but quite substantial nevertheless. What's ironic, though, is that a number of people have indicated a discomfort with the extended back and forth. Interesting that so many want simply to express their opinions and not be called upon to explain or defend those opinions. But perhaps that's the inherent nature of Social Media. Cheers!

Jerry Fletcher

Jerry Fletcher

3 years ago #147

#129
Phil The problem as I see it is the inability of most folks to get through all the emotional hangups they have as well as the inability to see and describe relationships logically based on observation not supposition. Then, too, it is difficult at times not ot get so entangled in your own hypothesis you can't find clarity. Whatever our views, we have to give the good Doctor kudos for sparking commentary!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#161
https://www.bebee.com/producer/@ali-anani/living-life-fully#c25

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#159
Thank you dear Tausif Mundrawala and I am so glad to read your comments again. The discussions on this buzz are of the highest standards. There shall always be noises, but the overall discussions are overwhelming with their quality. There are comments in this buzz that each one of them deserves to be a buzz on its own. Thank you and I shall not quoit writing. If I fail then at least I learn. How could I stop writing and lose contacts with beautiful souls such as yours. I send you a special invitation to comment on my buzz of today because it is about a book that our friend published recently. We need your feedback.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#152
It shall be my next buzz. I published a buzz today because I promised to publish it. It is a quick review of the wonderful book that the distinguished brain Edward Lewellen published few days ago. I do appreciate commenting on this buzz to show support for one of our friend. https://www.bebee.com/producer/@ali-anani/living-life-fully Harvey Lloyd

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

We needed a breakaway minutes and they are truly refreshing. May I say at this point that I miss Sara Jacobovici and I am sure you all do too.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#153
When they pair they become two in one and I appreciate your humbleness

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#150
You make me now laugh more, Lisa. If my sides burst laughing there shall be no use to the arrows in my head.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#149
Sometime the "noise" becomes our challenge. Thank you for all your contributions to the discussions. I fully appreciate each comment of yours.

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #139

#146
Thanks ...gotta bandaid? lol...

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #138

#148
...damn....think I fell on mine... :)

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#145
For two minutes I am laughing after reading your comment dear Lisa Vanderburg. You have to remember the one arrow is mine and the other is yours. Now, please don't ask me which arrow is pointing down?!!! All I can say that they are paired for long times to come.

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #136

#143
Thanks Dude Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee! Need a swarm sometimes :)

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #135

#142
haha...I think I tripped a switch and fried a few brain cells :) Fascinating, fabulous discussion my friend Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee..your arrow-heads are perfectly aligned!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#143
Thank you dear Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee described these discussion as "massive thinkathon". This is truly what beBee is.

Javier 🐝 CR

Javier 🐝 CR

3 years ago #133

135 comments... thanks Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#140
At this point of time I can hardly remember who said what, but I can easily remember what was said. So, we are on the same boat Lisa Vanderburg. If you are in any way referring to the electricity circuit I mentioned who said it to show that I was also concerned with the comment and therefore had the right to respond to it.

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #131

#136
Whoops....had to re-do it: wrong number. Phil: I agree with @Jim Murray's comment #44 in which he says 'Just because something is critical, which you could consider this comment and Phil's to be, that does not IMHO make it negative. It merely represents a different point of view.' You responded to Ali's #131, but not to mine. But I do want you to know I have enjoyed your comments and learn from them. Respectfully, Lisa

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #130

#137
See, I'm so lost Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee...can't remember who said what or when ! I'm also a terrible mixer of metadoms and idiphors :)

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #129

#144
Phil: I agree with Jim Murray's comment #44 in which he says 'Just because something is critical, which you could consider this comment and Phil's to be, that does not IMHO make it negative. It merely represents a different point of view.' You responded to Ali's #131, but not to mine. But I do want you to know I have enjoyed your comments and learn from them. Respectfully, Lisa

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#136
It is taking the whole and not the parts Phil Friedman. For the sake of illustrations and using common and familiar signs to illustrate a point is totally different than what story they tell. Yes, I can use arrows to communicate my points and I see nothing wrong with that. If my message that male and female pair and I say it this way it shall be less effective than to use arrows to show pairing as is the case in chemical bonding. Male and female bond by pairing to produce us, and not a male or female alone can produce. The value of the two (whether positive or negative) is in their pairing. If you are objecting to the use of arrows I tell you I am very comfortable with out because 95% of the readers and discussions here understood me. This is the purpose of writing. I must say I fail completely to understand your point of view. I shall be even more open and say it has no relevance to the idea of pairing. I have to agree with Lisa Vanderburg point of view which she expressed in her previous comment. With all honesty- I feel we are going in circles as far as this issue is concerned. I only hope this issue shall not be personalized. As much as I respected your buzz of yesterday, I am equally puzzled by your comments here.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#135
Lisa Vanderburg- I wrote on same "making this point about metaphors that is really just distracting from the point of the buzz"?, in a previous comment here. I do understand you, but fail completely why this distraction is for and what purpose it serves, if any? If the electrical circuit isn't a relevant example of pairing positive and negative then you and I are walking in a destination that is foreigner to the commenter. I can create one hundred distracting issues from the main theme of the buzz, but this is then a welcome act to do? no by all means.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #126

#131
So, then, Ali, would you assign the females of our society the "up" arrow or the "down" arrow? The "positive" label or the "negative" label? My point is not to deny that there are oppositional couples that work in complementary ways, but to reject labels that surreptitiously introduce extraneous value judgments due to the connotations that attach to the terms employed. But so far, it seems I've failed to make that clear to anyone other than Jim Murray -- which failure to communicate should be a hint for me to pack up my tent and head elsewhere. Thank you for your tolerance and hospitality. Cheers!

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #125

#134
haha....I know what you're saying Phil! What I don't understand is why you insist on making this point about metaphors that is really just distracting from the point of the buzz? In your Finding the Right Balance, you say: 'For more than a few decades, I've remained stubbornly committed to the principles of free speech and expression. And I try β€” really hard and especially as a writer β€” to maintain that commitment, even when I read things with which I vehemently disagree.' I feel you are trying to make a point here that negates your statement above and I'm just too 'simple' to get it - love you to expand on why this is so very important! Chin-Chin!

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #124

#132
No, Lisa, that is too facile a dismissal. The point of using a metaphor is to indirectly elucidate a concept or idea that is otherwise difficult to get one's intellectual hands around. It's very much like exploring a conceptual model in Science. And therefore the metaphor must be chosen carefully, lest it lead only to a false impression of understanding, rather than to genuine insight. I see the same issue almost daily on beBee with writers and commenter who relish using the bee-colony metaphor for social interactions here on the platform, yet refuse to accept all of the implications of doing so. Personally, I believe that to do so is to treat metaphors as literary jewelry -- shiny baubles that catch the eye, but which carry no underlying significance... to use, if I may, a metaphor. IMO. Cheers!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#132
That is precisely the point Lisa Vanderburg. This is what pairing is all about and you put it simply in terms that are understandable to all.

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #122

#127
I stand corrected Phil, but only in a linguistic sense! Conceptually, I'll stand by my comment as it serves as a metaphor that's suggests we can't have one end without the other! Besides, you're a knowledgeable literalist that's far too clever for me :)

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#128
The idea of pairs is a strong one. Just one simple example Jerry Fletcher- can we imagine the world with males or females only? They aren't opposite forces (they may), but they are doing many coupling roles as well. No production and end of the humans if the two sexes didn't exist. The existence of living creatures would end. The basic unit of thinking is pairs and we need to think in terms of pairing ideas. I am therefore in full agreement with your simply and directly stated comment. I thank you so much for reading all comments before writing a comment. I also greatly appreciate your kind words.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#127
Again, Lisa Vanderburg din't initiate the circuit idea. I did in my comment. I like to keep facts simple. Can we have an electric circuit with a positive pole only? Or, with a negative pole only? If they "stand together" they have value; alone are deprived of it. It is BOTH. This is consistent with the idea that pairs are much stronger than a singular element. They need not oppose each other as you stated in your response; if they would then they are not pairing to start with. It is looking at these two together that make the use of negative has a positive meaning.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #119

#128
Actually, Jerry Fletcher, I think it is perfectly possible to do so in western thinking -- provided that we choose our metaphors carefully and avoid certain terms the carry value-laden connotations. For example, a fast boat lifts up onto plane and runs on top of the water because of the resistance that the water provides against the hull running *through* it. This resistance is opposed by motive force seeking to drive the boat through the water. But the two forces, motive and resistive work not only in opposition, but as complements to push the hull up onto the surface of the water where it runs at much greater speeds than it would otherwise be able to achieve. Note the absence of value-laden labels. All are just natural factors, neither better nor worse than the other and each requires the other to achieve the result. Similarly with ideas espoused by strong minds. The oppositional interaction one against the other force both "upward to greater height", which would not happen if one or the other simply breezed ahead. This, I submit, is why dissent and critical comment are so important in an intellectual environment. For without a meeting of oppositional forces all becomes too easy and self-delusional.!IMO. Cheers!

Jerry Fletcher

Jerry Fletcher

3 years ago #118

I'm late to the party today. I've read through the comments and once again Dr.Anani has caused a massive thinkathon. Early on someone mentioned yin/yang. Based on what I'm seeing here it is difficult for most of us to carry the idea of dualistic-monism in our minds. It is easier to consider and reflect upon a singular quality or aspect or quantification and not accept the idea that one cannot exist without the other. Is it possible that this is an ingrained problem of "Western" thinking?

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #117

#100
with all due respect, Lisa, the metaphor of a direct current battery that you've chosen does not illucidate the notion of oppositional forces or actions because the negative and positive poles of the battery are NOT in the least opposing one another but are labeled such to distinguish their electrical potential with (speaking roughly) one giving up electrons whilst the other accepts them resulting in an electrical current. But the direction of the current depends on whether the battery is discharging or being charged, so at times the "giving" and "taking" functions are exchanged. There is no oppositional state, only the mispercetion of one, based on the connotations of the terms "negative" and "positive". This demonstrates, I believe, that 1) metaphors must be chosen with great care if they are to be useful and not pure BS, and 2) we must always be careful of the connotations of the words we use, lest we convey a meaning we did not intend. Cheers!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#124
And if we don't disagree we shall not learn Lisa Vanderburg

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#123
Equally, we are learning a lot from you Lisa Vanderburg

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #114

#111
Great pleasure to read your contribution Jim Murray - I am humbled to be cited! As made me think in #44, we can't let our attitudes become our creed; they just get in the way of re-seeding our values. That's exactly the 'noise' you wisely picked up in your #113 comment, Chris. I have learned a lot through the discourse regarding this buzz. The best is that we can agree to disagree with civility and agape respect.

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #113

#110
Wow - that's clout, CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit...Yay! An excellent point you made Manjit #112 about our own mental bandwidth. Conservation of self is important insofar as what you can 'spend' on others. I'm not very good at doing things for me, but for someone else...? But I am privileged to learn from such great minds like you and those here.

Frans van Wamel

Frans van Wamel

3 years ago #112

Ahoi Captain, it is nice from you, and, to remind me that we indeed spoke about that a few years ago. Since then, my weaknesses has become my focus Phil. However, my journey has lead me to some fantastic first hand experiences in order to become a Cultural Change Practitioner, using the Science of Action Learning - something I completed 13 years ago, (by being a scholar with one of the founding fathers of this field!) - which in essence hinges around increasing dialogue between the Self and others - but never used in an official capacity. So I look at my notes with all those companies that have helped me to stretch my knowledge about learning from your own actions, and they have in fact been great examples of personal experience of how to understand reality. I've been an "under cover" change agent for a decade now so to speak. I had the knowledge but never told anyone, apart from the last place I worked where I had a regular cup of coffee with the CEO. The biggest problem with OD change agents is the presence of the change agent in the shaping of the change in the organization. I am proud to be named in the only video where we learn that a consultant wil rarely (ever?) hear the truth: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=le0yzpU5zHM

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#120
You are a "fountain of knowledge" CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit. I am prepared to cry

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

3 years ago #110

#116
Remember when we reach our limits think of Inigo Montoya in Princess Bride https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YY4cnMmo9qw and the parody that it represents when he says "My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepared to die" and his nemesis who says "are you still trying to win". Sometimes the drama is best left to the movie screen but if the dramatic adds educational value, then "My name is Inigo Manjit, you killed my blog, prepare to cry" :-)

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#111
To take the effort and highlight few key points from the comments is a great action on your part CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit made in his previous comment. There are nuggets of wisdom and some great analogies and creative metaphors in these comments. I am so pleases that you understand my point of view as I am using positive and negative as carriers to explain what I mean and in no way directed at a person. Please dear Lisa Vanderburg you are tagged in both comments of Chris. I truly thank you Chris from the bottom of my heart.

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

3 years ago #108

#115
WOW! that is great news! In great anticipation I would also like to thank the beBee team who will bring this to live that you have cc'd in comment #115.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#115
Thank you for your immediate and energizing response Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#113
Thank you CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit did with her perfect example. Reading all the comments I feel proud for we have ideas here that deserve to be documented as Manjit suggested in his most-welcome comment.

Javier 🐝 CR

Javier 🐝 CR

3 years ago #105

yes ! CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#110
I need to draw the attention to your comment dear CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit. I sincerely hope that they would consider your suggestion. I stopped lately compiling my books for the reason you mentioned. Also, for the inclusion of comments in my case shall make the book voluminous. I have a supportive suggestion. As we have hives of interest, so why don't we have "Hives of thoughts". There are some great comments and metaphors on the comment section that really make beBee stand out as the platform for the exchange of comments. I do hope that your great idea resonates in the ears of the respected beBee staff. We need to document great comments because they stand out as points of distinction.

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

3 years ago #103

#100
Lisa Vanderburg don't forget that even as we contemplate this difficult balance between the opposing sides of a battery, that the chief battery within any human being is our own mental bandwidth. Once that bandwidth is consumed, balance is immaterial, great comments or horrible comments are immaterial, it is at the end of the day who we are and here we have to be either kind to ourselves or even humble about how much we can consume. The other battery in a human being is our willpower and even will is finite resource and replenishment is as diverse as we each are. I welcome the diversity in this thread because it is not common to see such a diverse set of human beings engage, so that is a good thing. The consumption of bandwidth is no different to our various to our physical capacities for digital booze - some can handle only a little and others can drink a virtual reservoir but in either case it is good to know what it is we consume and when we are becoming consumed by it :-)

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

3 years ago #102

#94
It is the new thinking and value that I treasure though in a buzz like this the whole is bookworthy for many comments here deserve their own chapter. Online of course it deserves its own buzz - but if it is bookworthy then I hope that future beBee design can create a bee book format, where we can assemble the conversation as our own books. Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee you already do that via slideshare where you utilize comments and your buzzes to assemble e-books. Slideshare also allows snippets and snapshots and ironically it is now owned by LinkedIn. That is what makes the whole very difficult because so many streams of great thought have been unleashed here. Curating this thread is a valuable exercise if we can easily assemble this into our own e-books and that is why new thinking and the value I treasure has the potential for me to learn. Chapters within hives are no different to hexagons, honey is a hive activity that contributes to the whole.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#108
This is again another example of great comments that fill fill the heart with joy and the mind with energetic ideas. Thank you dear Joanne Gardocki for you added a whole new dimension to the discussion- the blending of pairs so that new colors appear as the merging of two ideas contrarian ideas (say white and black) to produce a balancing third color. It just happened that I have just commented on a buzz about love that you tagged me and I wish we all apply love when we add comments. As the author wrote in his buzz "To hate is to remember, to love is to forget"- I belong to to forgetting. What a way to say it white and black rather than positive and negative- however; I didn't invent the dictionary. You showed in all your comments how to make opposites agree peacefully and with purpose. I say thank you.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #100

#84
Greetings, Frans, it is good to hear that you are firmly-footed again on your journey. It has been a long, strenuous trek, I know. Sometimes private messaging is better, as you know from the early days of Writers 4 Writers. Cheers!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#104
You stand up straight with no skewness Lisa Vanderburg. You said it right and in an almost perfect manner "'We inflate our hopes and rush to accept it' and that is as dangerous as too much negativity". It is combining both ends that gives the balance, as you comment is my dear friend.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#104
You stand up straight with no skewness Lisa Vanderburg. You said it right and in an almost perfect manner "'We inflate our hopes and rush to accept it' and that is as dangerous as too much negativity". It is combining both end that give the balance, as you comment is my dear friend.

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #97

#103
...yay! I made 100!! haha Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee Yes, we are both sides of the battery at once. Some are much better than others at using their negative side for say...righteous indignation. Some are seeking to do away with their negative side altogether. Some are just way too positive; as you said in your comment #99 'We inflate our hopes and rush to accept it' and that is as dangerous as too much negativity. We are not designed for perfection, but there's no harm it trying! Let's face it: getting 'balance' is hard enough for most of us! Me? My + & - ends depend on which way up I'm standing :)

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#100
That your balanced comment carries the # 100 is a perfect coincidence dear Lisa Vanderburg. We can only beat our flawed or skewed opinions if we pair them. Now, I hope you don't ask me about skewed and whether it is positive or negative- all I say that pairing the two helps us make "innocent comments" as the see the word as a whole and not the "hole in our thinking"

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#100
That your balanced comment carries the # 100 is a perfect coincidence dear Lisa Vanderburg. We can only beat our flawed or skewed opinions if we pair them. Now, I hope you don't ask me about skewed and whether it is positive or negative- all I say that pairing the two help us make "innocent comments" as the see the word as a whole and not the "hole in our thinking".

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#100
That your balanced comment carries the # 100 is a perfect coincidence dear Lisa Vanderburg. We can only beat our flawed or skewed opinions if we pair them. Now, I hope you don't ask me about skewed and whether it is positive or negative- all I say that pairing the two help us make "innocent comments" as the the word as a whole and not "hole in our thinking".

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #93

#86
through #91. For what it's worth, I tend to think of Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee meaning as the opposing ends of a battery; we can have one without the other. Only through examination of the source of conflict can we ever really have a snow-balls chance in hell of resolution or 'harmony'. It's because we're not innocent but flawed; surely that's why we need to find better use of the negative side to keep it in check? Great debate!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I am sharing an example that I plan to mention in Part 2 of this buzz. I give the example of the buzz by Phil Friedman and his buzz in which he advised consultants not to accept equity in a start-ups as a substitute for payment. https://www.bebee.com/producer/@friedman-phil/the-devil-often-wears-entrepreneur We tend to see this offer as tempting (positive). We inflate our hopes and rush to accept it. This could be very risky for many reasons as the percentages of falling start-ups is alarming. They end up as start-downs. To deflate our hopes we should consider the risks of accepting such an offer. We need to pair the positive hopes with the cautious (negative) risk-consideration. It is this pairing of positive and negative that make us make wise decisions.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#84
" Being ignored is the worst thing one can experience as a human being". it is reaching this trough that made you search for alternatives and what great ones they are. You wrote "exchange a one way discussion into a more constructive way of communication to explore whether consciousness indeed arises when there are two (or more) contradicting sensory inputs at the same time". This is exactly the message I aimed at in writing this buzz and I salute you Frans for being so open to share your experience. You are an overly courageous person and that could have been your main source of trouble. Sadly, it can be yes to turn a courage into a punishment by poor managers. Your story moved my heart and I wish you success in your new endeavors.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#82
Frans van Wamel- This is a sad, but living example, of what I meant by writing this buzz. "I quickly stopped writing about my thoughts and discoveries. I've had a few attempts to engage on social media but my self confidence has been shot for a considerable time and I believed I that I have been incoherent for a while". This is because the managers took your opposing views alone without trying to couple them to their thinking and balance them. Sometimes, it is disastrous to work for companies with managers of such quality. Tis experience can be devastating and instead of seeing the value of negative position and ideas as coupling possibilities of their own to bond them they took the negative term in its absolute meaning. May be they saw it as a threat to their position and started fighting you as a person more than your opinions. Sadly, this is how the ball bounces and may be you need to consider a different approach to change the results. Being a "confronter" is a source of trouble for them.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#95
With all honesty this constraint would have stopped me completely from writing this buzz.

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

3 years ago #88

#91
to add, if we were to restrict ourselves to the literal meaning, how would words, language, understanding, corelation etc ever evolve? Thanks again

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#85
CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit- yes, and I agree "So context is important and discernment even more so". If I say I agree, and I do in this case that it is positive. It doesn't mean it is correct. For opposing views I say they are negative and in no way they mean I am correct (otherwise I am a narcissist. Just to throw the idea of pairing one has to be positive and the other negative- however; pairing them gives a new thinking and value. The value is in the whole and not the parts,

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#88
It is in the context indeed. When I say something and you oppose it then by common understanding it is going in a different direction. The direction is implicit as negative because of how humans have been doing it at all times. I can't involve myself in such issue while my main theme is to show the value of pairing that is coupling positive and negative. This is the main issue dear Devesh \ud83d\udc1d Bhatt

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#90
I responded to your comment indirectly in my previous comment Devesh \ud83d\udc1d Bhatt

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#89
To say the least I am disturbed by your comments is an understatement Phil Friedman #72 relieves me. I did explain that negative here means opposing, anti or whatever you find a suitable word. I can't change the vocabulary. Happiness is positive and that is a common understanding. Sadness is negative and it is how classified. Taking the two together and pairing them creates realities. Same with supporting, agreeing or positive comments and comments in the other direction- pairing them makes a different story. This is the theme of the buzz- pairing and not positive and negative each one on its own. I have enough dignity not to call opposing comments as negative other than they mean opposing. Opposing what positive, but they could sweep their directions when they pair.

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

3 years ago #83

#89
indeed they are. Your feedback is crystal clear and relevant. Now any change is a matter of concern for the writer. I would take due care regarding such connotations in future interactions. Thanks.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #82

#88
Devesh, the point is that the term "negative" has connotations (stubbornly attached implicit meaning) that make it pejorative in relation to its contrasting term "positive". Like "black hat" vs "white hat". Like "good" vs "bad". One cannot simply render "good" and "bad" to be value-neutral terms and say that calling my work good and yours bad does not imply a contrast in which my work is superior to yours. If, for example, Dr. Alani wants simply to distinguish between two views that are oppositional to one another, without implying any value judgment, then why not simply designate them respectively as view A (Alani's view) versus view B (the commenter's view). Since the labels 'A' and 'B' are indeed value-free?

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

3 years ago #81

#87
but we allow or restrict certain people to use words in whichever way they chose. I agree i am biased. To certain people it is negative. I agree i am willing to progress and shed my bias. To certain people this negative. I am willing to concede myself as negative in a limited context unless i have made a mistake with damaging consequences . I would only do that in retrospect. The only possibility to concede myself as negative pre-emptively or before anything wrong occurs... is to either prevent the occurence or to accept that this concession is to shift gears and become a listener or a reader. Sometimes a communication needs time to set in. It is not spoken, running away anywhere, it is written and can be revisited. So i ask myself, beyond the metaphors, why the effort to build such a context. What is the message? Is it an answer or a question?

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #80

#86
Devesh, my point in extending the challenge is to expose the hidden (or unrecognized) commitment to the value-laden connotations. You will notice that nobody has stepped forward to willingly accept the label of "negative" for their work while giving away the label of "positive" to the expression of opposing views. Why hasn't anyone? Because the labelsb DO hold Implied value connotations, despite Dr. Anani's protestations to the contrary. That is the nature of language: it has a life of its own and we cannot simply redefine and use words in our own ways.

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

3 years ago #79

#58
oh but why should i surrender to this context of positive and negative. It was a metaphorical example. Why not see it as such and try to translate it into an example that i can retain and ask the writer, is this what you are expressing? Here bias is a point of reference to link new learning with old experience. If i accept such metaphor in it's entirety, if i settle into this context, i am putting on blinders and narrowing my vision.

CityVP Manjit

CityVP Manjit

3 years ago #78

It does go back to Shakespeare's refrain "there is nothing good or bad in this world, thinking makes it so". I am not too invested in reading intent but one gets wise to comments which are sharp critiques (valuable) as opposed to trolling (negative battery). Another form of negative battery is a narcissist, for a narcissist also serves no purpose other than drain us. So context is important and discernment even more so. I can tell the difference between an opinion I might violently disagree with and a mindfucker. The latter is just bait and baiting is a technique that once understood loses its power. There is a model of discourse which is debate and such discourse can get very heated but it is not mindfucking. It is critical thinking in action and those debates can be very challenging. A feint hearted person or someone with an anxious or paranoid disposition will not get an advisory warning that vigorous debate is in progress. Yet not everything online is about critical thinking. I enjoy the buzzes here because there is also creative thinking at work, which is simply a different skill set. Here debate is not the challenging factor, design is. Some design thinkers have such powerful pattern recognition skills, that it is difficult to keep up with them. Then there is a third form of thinking which is reflective thinking. Socratic thinking does not just fall into critical thinking bucket, it is a very useful form for reflective thinking as well. We do not engage that enough otherwise we would answer more of our own question. We do not pour forth wisdom, we gain wisdom from our learning. Sometimes turning the other cheek or using the energy in a situation can be a mental aikido, so even mindfucking can be useful if we apply meaningful contextual intelligence to it and in that case we do get back to Shakespeare's quote from Hamlet mentioned above.

Frans van Wamel

Frans van Wamel

3 years ago #77

... In principle, for the last four years, none of my words about the knowledge of my experience have been taken for the truth. As a consequence, I've been homeless for a while and lived on the streets in Holland. However, as of the last few months I have found a residence in a social shelter for people who are different to that what society expects as normal, so in a way I feel right at home again - in more than one way as I have most been 'a loner' in my life. From as long as I can remember, I have always seen patterns that other did not recognise. Being ignored is the worst thing one can experience as a human being. Hence, the topic you spoke about attracted my interest. Over the last half year I have had thoughts that I rather not express. In saying that, it is only this week that I've been able to make some inroads to get a dialogue organized towards the quest to exchange a one way discussion into a more constructive way of communication to explore whether consciousness indeed arises when there are two (or more) contradicting sensory inputs at the same time, and am hopeful that the noble price one day will come to me as well. https://www.bebee.com/producer/@becoming-enlightened-by-frans/isn-t-it-nice-to-see-how-to-be-free. So, if I were to combine the concept of your article with that of my own, you might be able to perceive my suggestion to the "Hard Problem", something that science is still trying to piece together: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-nrsfZjDiq0&t=5111s. Thank you for letting me vent my emotions here at your blog Ali. I am confident you don't mind. Be well.

Frans van Wamel

Frans van Wamel

3 years ago #76

In principle, for the last four years, none of my words about the knowledge of my experience have been taken for the truth. As a consequence, I've been homeless for a while and lived on the streets in Holland. However, as of the last few months I have found a residence in a social shelter for people who are different to that what society expects as normal, so in a way I feel right at home again - in more than one way as I have most been 'a loner' in my life. From as long as I can remember, I have always seen patterns that other did not recognise. Being ignored is the worst thing one can experience as a human being. Hence, the topic you spoke about attracted my interest. Over the last half year I have had thoughts that I rather not express. In saying that, it is only this week that I've been able to make some inroads to get a dialogue organized towards the quest to exchange a one way discussion into a more constructive way of communication to explore whether consciousness indeed arises when there are two (or more) contradicting sensory inputs at the same time, and am hopeful that the noble price one day will come to me as well. https://www.bebee.com/producer/@becoming-enlightened-by-frans/isn-t-it-nice-to-see-how-to-be-free. So, if I were to combine the concept of your article with that of my own, you might be able to perceive my suggestion to the "Hard Problem", something that science is still trying to piece together: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-nrsfZjDiq0&t=5111s. Thank you for letting me vent my emotions here at your blog.

Frans van Wamel

Frans van Wamel

3 years ago #75

Yes I know the feeling Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee. Two weeks from now, I have been trying to do away with the accusation of being "out of my mind" by the White Coat fraternity here in Holland for the last two years - after I already having had that experience in Australia because I kept on losing my work there with whomever I worked for. It seemed that the bosses were always right, no matter what. It was the reason for the return to my home country. Although I was hopeful in the beginning, I quickly stopped writing about my thoughts and discoveries. I've had a few attempts to engage on social media but my self confidence has been shot for a considerable time and I believed I that I have been incoherent for a while, as all logical conclusions from my perspective were dismissed out of hand. It is because of the stubbornness for science to examine their own assumptions, that I sadly lost not only all contact with my own family in Australia, but also was prevented to make any headway with my immediate next of kin living here in holland - because they also can only point to the dogma's they have exposed themselves to during their lifetimes. Don't worry, none of them would be using BeBee, and I can certainly not blame them for their ignorance of wanting to know what reality is. end part 1

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#80
True, because people tend to stay with what the know. I can write a book on scientists who published great discoveries only to be rejected and even accused of craziness. Later, they won Nobel Prizes for their discoveries. I agree with you @Frans van Warnel

Frans van Wamel

Frans van Wamel

3 years ago #73

When it comes to new information, we either accept or reject, and more often choose to leave the unexplored unexamined.

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #72

#71
it's because I thought I'd removed it - a spanking being sufficient...clearly not removed enough!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#77
Try to comment on it and your comment shall appear on another buzz

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #70

#71
I agree! Took long enough to even show up!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#74
If I were younger I would work with you on an e-book. The sponge example is perfect and we may never end in a point. One opinion is one point and this is degrading. Similar opinions or thinking is a one point view. What a great thinker you are Joanne Gardockii. Please write more for we need more people of your caliber.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#74
I I were younger I would work with you on an e-book. The sponge example is perfect and we may never end in a point. One opinion is one point and this is degrading. Similar opinions or thinking is a one point view. What a great thinker you are Joanne Gardocki. Please write more for we need more people of your caliber.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#72
The highlight line of my buzz for me as an author is "Pairing positives and negatives is excellent advice applicable to many situations as you illustrate". That is my main message and you picked it and added to it Joanne Gardocki. I am writing a buzz on this buzz to address many comments here and including an answer to your question. I love the added examples you provide and I find my comment #65 in complete harmony with yours. Many comments raised the issue of unaccepting my use of negative comments, which assumes I am right and they are wrong. It is part and parcel, positive comments don't exist without opposing ones. This doesn't mean that are negative of low value. Not at all, all it means they have different direction as I explained in my previous comments with further examples and clarifications in my next buzz. You understood me perfectly well my friend.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#67
- Something funny daar Lisa Vanderburg- i commented on your buzz, but the comment exports to another buzz- same buzz each time. Strange!!!

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #65

#67
damn...you won't find it....unless you google: https://www.bebee.com/producer/@lisa-vanderburg/the-fraud-squad-number-doesn-t-exist See?....told you I'm trouble! Such a fine man, dear Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee! Yes...part 'free' was part word-play and part realization that my kids now want me curtailed :) Good luck on that!! Thanks friend! Life is short - does it really matter? Truth is L O N G :)

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #64

#67
damn...you won't find it....unless you google: https://www.bebee.com/producer/@lisa-vanderburg/the-fraud-squad-number-doesn-t-exist See?....told you I'm trouble! Such a fine man, dear Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee! Yes...part 'free' was part word-play and part realization that my kids now want me curtailed :) Good luck on that!! Thanks friend! Life is short - does it really matter? Truth is L O N G :)

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#63
"The bystander effect is an element of social psychology that implies that when the number of bystanders is increased in an emergency situation, the less likely any of the bystanders will aid, or assist in the situation". This is a wonderful article and thank you dear Lisa Vanderburg for bringing it to my attention. I wonder if you are considering writing a buzz on the bystander effect on social media where some people may crowd a" collision of ideas" and there hindrance to the access of real commenters. This is a great idea to apply on social media and differentiating beBee from other platforms.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#63
"PART free"- did you mean it dear Lisa Vanderburg, or Part three? No matter what you are a free person with free mind and heart. #63 You moved my head with your sharpness. I am now off to find out if I have already read your buzz or not.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#64
WOW! Synchronicity again my dear Lisa Vanderburg. I had written my previous comment before refreshing the page and find your comment. Apparently, the current shall not flow again because w are in agreement. I better find another issue to differ with you :)))

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#58
#60 I just wish to summarize my point of view using another familiar example. We only may have an electronic circuit if e have positive and negative poles. What keeps the "current of comments" flowing is that we have positive (agreeing) and negative (disagreeing) comments, without which we shall have no current. Who dare say that disagreeing comments have no positive role as a prime pole?

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #59

#62
Correct, my dear Sir Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee; you are not negating one for the other, but embracing them both (ouchy though it is!). Absolutely we have to have the negative as well as a positive, or we would be demigods.....that's no fun at all :) Pain/pleasure, rage/serenity, wrath/forgiveness - those truths you understand above all that I know as a human; flawed, yet perfect! :)

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #58

PART free: okay. Like you, respected friend Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee, I too can take a little whoopin'. We all know that so that is not the point. In a way, this very fruitful discussion has been hugely beneficial in laying down 'rules of engagement'. But you're damn right in your sharing the damning comment to David Navarro L\u00f3pez in his #33, "Ali Anani, PhD, Sir your Post's are vacuous and present no intellectual basis for discourse". That's LI - a few pseudo-profs with huge bulbous egos and not much else: no disrespect to the REAL heroes, that are legion! Ironically, I haven't been here of late (in part) because I got told off by one of my kids. He has a wee one of his own now and I have received a rather silly death-threat due to something I buzzed and removed right here. My children tell me I'm reckless, but I have an over-blown sense of 'do-right', like http://psychrod.com/the-bystander-effect/ Knock a few heads with your gentle way...it's how stuff moves!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#60
I wish you would answer the question Lisa Vanderburg. All I wish to emphasize here is that I am not classifying negative as bad as I explained in my last few comments. It is a whole (plus and minus together). There is no positive comment if there is no negative one. It all falls on our understanding of them. A reductionist mind would see them separate. Again, I give the active unpaired negative electron as an example. It is active and bonds with another electron for it seeks pairing with another electron. The two electrons can't spin in one direction. They can only spin in two opposing directions. We call one electron with positive spin and the other very similar electron with negative spin. The two electrons are identical, but it is only to show that their pairing has different spin directions. The same way I view positive and negative comments. They are the two spinning electrons.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#57
While waiting for your part 2 comment I couldnt resist expressing my love of these lines "In every horror, there is a moment of the purest beauty. In the barrenness of grief, there is the tiniest interval of distraction. By comparison, in that moment of sheer triumph, there is that niggle of doubt; do I really deserve it". ABsolutely, we can't have one without the other. If one vanishes the other shall do as well. You are correct dear Lisa Vanderburg. I respect so much the fact that you see the whole picture before commenting. That you make such an effort makes the author very responsive to your comments. I salute you my friend.

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #55

PART duh: Even though I am the WORLD'S WORSE at 'knowing myself', I still get to opine - ain't that fun! #42 Phil said '....carry an undercurrent of preferential ranking.' To-whit Jim Murray responds; 'Classifying points of view that are different from your own as negative diminishes them in favor of your own.' Just how much praise v criticism is 'acceptable'; I believe this to be the value of your buzz, Ali? That leads onto...what is civility? Several have address this in some form or other. Utmost, the question is; what allows for growth, expansion and diverse enhancement? There is a part of us (especially ME) that is always going to be a tad 'psychotic' or at least moody, so how do we reconcile this? The person should just say 'oops...my bad' if they're big enough, no? - END: part duh-

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#58
Your comment is like the negative pressure of trees- I mean it means survival. Phil Friedman- I tried to explain pairing and how it can help us. I found no better way than expressing the pairs in opposing directions or signs. How otherwise could I have paired them or( be able) to explain my point of view. I do appreciate your comment. I just want to emphasize again that in no way I degrade contrarian comments, it is just calling the negative to distinguish them from agreeing comments. How else we could have a pair? Again, like minus debt- it is negative in sign, but welcome for its meaning I have no debt. Even though I am indebted to say thank you.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #53

#56
#55 The matter can be settled in a very straightforward manner. If the terms 'negative' and 'positive' are value neutral, why is it that the remarks of the post's author are labeled positive and the oppositional comments labeled negative? Why don't we say the initiating statements are negative and the.comments positive? I can live with that. Can you guys?

Lisa Vanderburg L

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #52

Just read both buzz/posts, links & comments..phew; I'm exhausted dear man, Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee! My tuppence is going to be far less cerebral than the others, but I'll try & put it into words. I attract arrows; always have. Why? Am I 'made' that way (looking David Navarro L\u00f3pez #8 slide)? Am I contentious? Am I just trouble? On Bebee, I have had more unsavoury comments than on LI, but I much prefer the 'honesty' of this platform, and I write here what I want, instead of what I'm duty-bound. But you are absolutely right to bring this up - just look at the healthy discussion! I think it's possibly healthy to have the odd stone thrown at you, but not a boulder; no excuse for that. In every horror, there is a moment of the purest beauty. In the barrenness of grief, there is the tiniest interval of distraction. By comparison, in that moment of sheer triumph, there is that niggle of doubt; do I really deserve it? -END: part uh?-

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#55
You bring to my mind another good example of pairing. Why ferro materials are magnetic? Because they have a negative unpaired electron. This negativity that make these materials so valuable because they are ready to pair and align their directions. IMy mind pais with your s Devesh \ud83d\udc1d Bhatt

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

3 years ago #50

#54
.. got it now. Pairing repelling statements. But negative and positive attract in the scientific sense but repel in the social context, notional sense. In contrast, the context any repel each other only if we presume them as such, they may be paired up if we presume as such and they may repel and yet get paired.. if presumed as such. The mind often ignores the simple things. I had to read you again and get the right reference. I learn from your writings. THANKS

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#53
Well, I was referring to my point of reference mainly Devesh \ud83d\udc1d Bhatt. Please do ato ensure that I understood you wel. You know of my great admiration of your mind and I am truly honored to read your comments.

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

3 years ago #48

#50
never got into the negative positive statement. Maybe i never got my message through. Means i have to restate it better.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

they make me them- sorry as I meant make me think

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#49
Thank you Phil Friedman trees lift up water from soil using negative pressure. Without negative pressure trees would die. This is an example of negative that means survival. When I say negative comment I mean an opposing one and in no mean I belittle it. The proof is in this dialogue. Without negative comments (again I mean in their direction, but not value) we would not be exchanging comments. I have full respect of your comments because they make me them and even if I call them negative as per my term of reference I admit their positive outcome.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#46
Thank You Devesh \ud83d\udc1d Bhatt. I wonder ifI say positive and negative signs if they would hurt in any way. These are expressions for the direction. We are biased towards thinking that night is dark, but can we have the dawn without having night? Yes, I tend to be biased to some issues that you mention; however saying that my use of opposing comments as negative means nothing without considering what positive ones are. Negative doesn't mean bad; it means it points to a different direction. I ask myself when in chemical reactions we have a reverse reaction- does it in any way say this reaction is bad? Trees lift up water up to heights reaching 100 meters using negative pressure. Without it trees would die. Is negative pressure here a one? I invite for more comments on this issue for we have different points of reference among us as you rightly wrote.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #44

#47
Ali, an empty comment of the kind you mention is not worthy of response, yet by the same token should not be used as the basis for the system of classification you lay out in this article. For the comment you cite does not have any complementary or oppositional value and is no more than a grunt or other rude bodily noise. The danger is in confusing such grunts with substantive oppositional comments and labeling them all "negative".

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#45
no as I meant positive negative coexist Phil Friedman. We can't have one without the other. Iin thermodynamics we say you don't get anything for nothing.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#44
Thank you Jim Murray. However; if I respnd in a comment that says your buzz is emty and worthless what would you feel? I classified this comment as repellent and now I add chaotic because it is chaotic and has no direction. To say it is contrsrian or negative meaning that it has a different direction id nt really true.

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

3 years ago #41

Often our classification of things differ. Therein lies the problem. I have a bias because i respect my experience. I have an open mind because i respect the possibility to learn. Many presume these as opposite ideas, wheereas they are usually supplementary until specific conditions of conflicting choices arise. Bias is a point of reference and progress towards objectivity the journey from the point of reference, to evolve to an unbiased state within the presumed context which dynamically evolves and changes itself. Why do we presume conflict and simulate the contradictory state repeatedly when the probability of occurence of the actual circumstance is rare, unless we invite it? Once we invite it, why dont we accept it as a challenge we yearn to overcome?

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #40

#43
Ali, I expect that @Philip Louis D'Amato will be somewhat perplexed by your reply, but I am not. However, when you say, "I ned [sic] not emphasize that positive and negative coexist such as the positive and negative side effects of a drug ...", you only reinforce my point. The "negative" side effects of a drug are always UNWANTED and would always be eliminated if at all possible. Consequently, if we continue with your choice of metaphor, the implication is that such oppositional comments are not welcomed and are thought of as, by definition, hostile. But not all countervailing ideas or oppositional discussions are hostile. And to my mind, it is intellectually counterproductive (as well as being inadvertently revealing) to use the label 'negative'. The Chinese concept of the opposition between Yin and Yang does not carry the connotation that Yang is inferior to Yin, but sees them as coordinate and necessary complements. I suggest to you and your followers that the same is true of oppositional dialogue. Of course, it is your prerogative to speak and write as you see fit. I am only, in the spirit of philosophical discussion, making a point about not allowing an implicit or hidden value judgment to creep into your consideration of critical comments. Cheers!

Jim Murray

Jim Murray

3 years ago #39

#42
Phil Friedman brings us a very interesting point, which is something we have discussed, and is something which exists to a very great degree in the world today, and that is the notion of the how we create polarization with our attitudes. Just because something is critical, which you could consider this comment and Phil's to be, that does not IMHO make it negative. It merely represents a different point of view. Classifying points of view that are different from your own as negative diminishes them in favor of your own. And it closes off that part of your mind that might actually learn something from paying serious attention to those opposing points of view. Sadly, a lot of us have fallen into that pattern. I have been guilt of it myself from time to time. If we can somehow break out of that pattern, we would, I am certain, see that good ideas can come from any direction. But before they can be appreciated they need to be accepted, not automatically assigned a downward arrow.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#42
thank you Phillip Louis D 'Amato for your positive comment. I ned not emphasize that positive and negative coexist such as the positive and negative side effects of a drug. I needed to use the arrows to show didection. Positive and negative could be replaced by upwards and downwards. Likrwise an aggreeing and disagreeing comments. If I uss theword negative it is in the sense disagreeing and in way negative in a bad way. I am referring to a. comment that falls outside the domain of this understanding. I differed with you many times before but I kept my respect to your points of view which iI still do.

Phil Friedman

Phil Friedman

3 years ago #37

Ali, finding myself in a reflective mood on a Sunday morning, I am moved -- as I am usually not -- to make a comment here. I cannot find the derogatory comments on LinkedIn to which you refer and, therefore, cannot speak directly to them. However, in this piece, you say, "I welcome negative ideas. I represent them with an arrow pointing downwards." With all due respect, I should like to point out that your use of the terms 'negative' and 'positive' involved, in English, concurrently attach implicit judgments. For unlike 'Yin' and 'Yang' (and similar terms), 'negative' and 'positive' do not portray simple opposition or polarity but carry an undercurrent of preferential ranking. I find it significant that you label the comments which may take issue with your assertions "negative" -- and symbolize them with a downward arrow. And that, in contrast, you label your own statements (and those of others which support you) as "positive" and symbolize those with an upward arrow. I am neither saying nor implying that your choice of terms is conscious or explicit, but it does, to my mind, betray a particular value judgment that is inconsistent with the Socratic spirit -- and, for that matter, with the spirit of Averroes. I also believe it illustrates the intellectual dangers of being too casual with the employment of metaphors. Personally, when I publish an article, I value all comments -- both supporting and opposing -- equally. Provided only that they are substantive and relatively polite. Or if they are impolite, at least amusing and not simply nasty. And I personally do not consider, and am careful not to label those comments which simply disagree with what I have to say, "negative". Just a thought to ponder over coffee on a Sunday morning. Cheers!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

My dear friend David Navarro L\u00f3pez- I remember I wrote a slideshare presentation titled "Stupidity Spawns Creativity": https://www.slideshare.net/hudali15/stupidity-spawns-creativity If I believe that comment is stupid then I expect some creative ideas to emerge. This is in a way a reverse thinking- getting creative ideas from stupid ones. So, the stupid comment should ignite my creativity. I accepted the challenge on myself and I am reporting my findings in my next buzz. Finally, I succeeded to pair stupidity with creativity. I am referring to your comment and my response in my next buzz.

David Navarro LΓ³pez

David Navarro LΓ³pez

3 years ago #35

#39
I don't know why do you get surprised; if he thinks that your posts are vacuous and...(bark bark) how in heaven did you expect he was doing....what? LOL

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#38
It surprises me David that he didn't realize that he was offending all other commenters who had different opinions than him. Also, his not realization that I used many examples from literature and as insisted that there no such thing as reverse thinking. I had to find a way to ask him to walk out and he did. The issue is we need opposing perspectives. bur not repelling ones because such comments are like insects and repelling them becomes the only way out.

David Navarro LΓ³pez

David Navarro LΓ³pez

3 years ago #33

A good question could be: If is not presenting basis for discourse, why are you commenting? Just to show you are not so vacuous? Again, to me is like a barking dog. To hell with it.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#33
I shall share a starting comment that I received from the commenter. "Ali Anani, PhD, Sir your Post's are vacuous and present no intellectual basis for discourse". What do I learn from this comment? Surely, I responded in a gentleman way, but the tone didn't change . I said my dear friend David Navarro L\u00f3pez that I love pairing criticism with compliment, but with such repelling comment I decided then to keep a distance from this commenter. Yes, I recall well and I am not surprised at all that it received so many views. You and I had some different ideas occasionally, but we kept the dignity of each other trying to find what best for both of us. If I had dared to write a comment as the one I received could be be still talking and learning from each other?

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#32
Again, in conformity with the comment of Pamela \ud83d\udc1d Williams. I promise to give some visual new insights on pairing soon in honor of both of you and I do appreciate your comments.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#31
#31 I shall expand soon on the idea of pairing and give further practical examples of its use. I salute your comment Pamela \ud83d\udc1d Williams and it is in honor of your comment that I am going to do so.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#31
I shall expand soon on the idea of pairing and give further practical examples of its use. I salute your comment Pamela \ud83d\udc1d Williams and it is in honor of your comment that I am going to do so.

David Navarro LΓ³pez

David Navarro LΓ³pez

3 years ago #28

Whenever I receive a negative comment, not just in posts, as well in my day-to-day life, it comes always to my mind the wise words of Winston Churchill: "You will never reach your destination if you stop and throw stones at every dog that barks" The first thing I do when facing a negative comment is to listen carefully to find out if together with the comment, it comes with a valid, structured reasoning oriented to enhance my words or actions. In short, I look for the aim behind of the comment. Typically, when somebody makes a negative comment with the aim of helping, it comes together with a way to rectify/enhance the criticised thing. If a comment doesn't come with the above mentioned, I consider it just "barking". And I deal with it as such: Smile, and go on. I have no time for dogs. As I face daily a lot of negativity, (German culture is what it is) I was compelled to write a presentation you might remember. The German version had more than 17.000 views https://www.slideshare.net/bicefablog/not-in-the-mood

Lisa Gallagher

Lisa Gallagher

3 years ago #27

I couldn't agree more with the idea of pairing Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee. You left this link on my buzz and I thank you. I have found through my grief over the past 1.5 yrs that the positive talk and positive things people have done lift me up and also make me lovingly return favors. It really is like the ying/yang. As one person told me a while back, "I will be the ying to your yang." We all experience very tough times and when we see others going through those times, if we can do anything to lift them up, well then, we've had a good day and hopefully it helps them to have a better day.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#27
I have just noticed that you wrote two comments dear Deb\ud83d\udc1d Lange, Brand Ambassador @beBee has just published and then I shall post this one.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#28
+Again, that we are in synchronicity is reflected from my previous buzz on SCouting the Power of Leadership: https://www.bebee.com/producer/@ali-anani/scouting-the-power-of-leadership In it I wrote "Here comes the analogy with leaders. Leaders who have magnetic power realize that aligning people towards a goal may lag behind. The leaders job is to create a magnetized field so as to cause the magnet-like employees to align towards a common goal (and I prefer a common purpose) and this alignment shall depend on the type of workers the leader has". I couldn't agree more with you dear Deb\ud83d\udc1d Lange, Brand Ambassador @beBee. Whatever we do must have a grand purpose and brainstorming isn't different. "So, when we give groups processes that help create guidelines for respect we enable new kinds of conversations to emerge"" I fully accept your point of view, Deb..

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#25
Dear Deb\ud83d\udc1d Lange, Brand Ambassador @beBee- I feel puzzled by your comment. Yes, I am puzzled and surprised in a very positive way. The reason is this. I noted down today an idea for a forthcoming buzz.The idea centers around going step by step in developing ideas so that we may avoid groupthink. My recommendation is to start with an idea to be discussed only by A and B. The outcome of this idea should be the input for person C and again the output shall be the input for person D and so on. This feedback effect may generate ideas that are devoid of being influenced non-productively in group discussions. I am now totally amazed by your comment and its high sense. I wonder where this synchronicityy comes from. This is why beBee is a great platform. We sense the values of the exchange of comments and respect differences in a grand manner without offending others. We have different experiences and lived in different cultures and differences in thinking shall exist always. This is a great opportunity to learn from each other and grow together. I have learnt a lot from you my friend.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#19
I fully concur with you Franci\ud83d\udc1dEugenia Hoffman, beBee Brand Ambassador, which I responded to before responding to your comment. I respond to comments in their chronological order. Therefore, I find your comment reflecting my own. I wanted to communicate the message in this buzz that we may have different opinions- one positive and one negative and this is a great opportunity to spin them together and create magnetic effect. Differences are great, but are much greater if expressed in a cordial tone. Like you said, comments reflect the character of their writers. Commenters who use harsh words or sweeping statements lead to repulsion instead of attraction to more learning. Aggressive comments reflect the aggression character of the author.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#18
Thank you and I go all the way with you. I am trying to use scientific reasoning in my buzzes to understand human behavior. I say I am trying, and I could be wrong. At least, I try and if I fail then I am learning. Thank you for being a great support all the way.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#16
Marcelo Martin- In one of my responses to the commenter I mentioned that I judge the quality of a buzz by the quality of comments the buzz receives. I am in full agreement with you. The comments are what enrich us all, but without neglecting that we exchange comments to learn and grow. I don't want to copy and paste the comment that was so aggressive because this way I elevate it. I have been one of the most fortunate bees by the exchanges of comments on my buzzes and therefore I value your comment greatly because I experienced what you said.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#15
The Arab poet said centuries ago "if we throw stones at each barking dog then stone would be more expensive than gold". Your comment Cyndi wilkins is in accordance with these lyrics. I don't mind and in fact welcome differences, but it is the use of harsh words that I object to. We are here to exchange experiences and ideas in a cordial atmosphere. I am truly obliged as many bees responded to the commenter who tried to score and turn the discussion into a win-lose one. It amazes me when we realize that the tone of voice has 90% of the effect and still these commenters use words with such repelling tones. At least, this man influenced me to write this buzz and receive such wonderful comments as yours is.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#14
Believe me my dear friend Edward Lewellen that I mentioned the repellent comment not because they hurt me, but because I try to sublime above little acts. It is far better in life to mention differences in a gentle way and not use harsh words as is the case with the commenter. I daren't say to somebody there is no such thinking such as reverse thinking when the literature is full of examples. I appreciate having caring minds such as yours. By the way I made sure the commenter has notice of this buzz because I have nothing to hide.

Franci 🐝Eugenia Hoffman, beBee Brand Ambassador

The quality of a comment is as important as the quality of the post. A comment is attached to the person that authored it, which reflects not only that their opinion but their persona, as well. I agree with Martin Wright that when you write you put yourself forward, which I feel the same applies to the commenter. I have seen many articles that have not attracted any comments, which I feel this is due to time constraints on the part of the reader or simply the reader has nothing of value to add. The topic has arisen before about articles receiving relevants only, being read with no comments, or a canned comment such as "nice post". I feel if an article is read, it deserves a comment, even if it is a canned and short and the equivalent to a thumbs up. In the case of Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee, I have not seen any of his articles that were not quality pieces and masterfully penned. I believe, as with anything, we can respectfully disagree, however, disrespect and negativity should not be tolerated. I have avoided getting involved in commenting on articles where the comments are disrespectful. I feel there is a greater chance that any opinions can be misconstrued at that point.

David B. Grinberg

David B. Grinberg

3 years ago #17

Kudos, Ali, on more words of wisdom that go beyond the superficial level of thinking to reveal universal truths of mathematics/physics and how theses rules (or laws of attraction) could apply to one's emotional state of mind. I'm also reminded of the popular saying, "Opposites attract" -- like in the subatomic world of protons, neutrons and electrons. Bravo once again, Ali!

David B. Grinberg

David B. Grinberg

3 years ago #16

Kudos, Ali, on more words of wisdom that go beyond the superficial level of thinking to revel otherwise unknown universal truths. I'm also reminded of the popular saying, "Opposites attract." I'm also reminded of the subatomic world of protons and electrons with their abilities to repel and attract. Bravo once again, Ali!

Martin Wright

Martin Wright

3 years ago #15

When you write an article you are putting yourself forward. Negative comments go with the territory. But in a sense they also highlight how you have engaged them out of passivity. But equally those who comment also find their own statements come under scrutiny. But in the end the saddest thing for an article is to have attracted no comment at all

Cyndi wilkins

Cyndi wilkins

3 years ago #14

Any comment coming in as derogatory or attacking the worthiness of your ideas is a soul in pain because he/she is lacking the connection to his/her own heart and higher mind...It is best to let that sleeping dog lie...lest he rise up to bite you in the arse;-) There isn't enough pepper spray on the planet to fend off the 'angry dog!' So sorry to hear of the loss of your young daughter Edward Lewellen...There is a special place in the heart of the universe for those who have lost children...I wish you and your family continued peace dear sir...

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#12
I appreciate your understanding and comment. As we here celebrate a feast day, your comment is my gift. I don't mind at all people to be contrarian. I mind the use of repelling words such as worthless buzz or commenters don't read other comments. Throwing accusations that are baseless is what makes me unwilling to "pair". It was only one commenter, but many others stood firmly against such repelling comments. Your comment when mixed with the previous comment of Harvey Lloyd #4 make a great story. You two gentlemen should be talking to each other for you have very interesting, relevant and amalgamating comments. I find your comment Geoff a remarkable one and it reflects your deep thinking. It is a star on its own with the scenarios that you present. My mind is spinning.

Geoff Hudson-Searle

Geoff Hudson-Searle

3 years ago #12

#5
Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee Thank you for your inclusion, I am truly sorry that you received negative feedback to your last blog, that frankly was fascinating from my individual prospective, it provoked thought and imagination to all the possibilities in life, truly I believe that there is no right or wrong in life, it is completely how you look at the matter at hand, interpretation and communications create pairing and alignment. Reading your blog who would you say is right and who would you say is wrong? There are basically three ways you can answer this which I will define based on intelligence. A completely ignorant person will favor one scenario over the other, not understanding the relationship between experience and perspective. A semi-intelligent individual, understanding this dualistic nature of humanity, will logically say that either both of them are right or both of them are wrong. But!… A truly wise hominid will conclude that there is no such thing as right and wrong. Right and wrong is neither here nor there because things just are. I love that quote by Joy Page 'People desire to separate their worlds into polarities of dark and light, ugly and beautiful, good and evil, right and wrong, inside and outside. Polarities serve us in our learning and growth, but as souls we are all. Have a great Saturday Ali!

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#10
True, and by trying to move in the opposite direction (or, may be better to say to spin in the opposite direction) can be very relieving.

Pascal Derrien

Pascal Derrien

3 years ago #10

The power of the opposites at play is sometimes a roller coaster if not a delicious and nutritious mystery :-)

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#8
Poetic comment and is rich with reality "...is perhaps the beauty of the duality which promote us to roll on with harmony, producing a jive to remain unity in opposites". Thank you dear Debasish Majumder for your lovely insights and for sharing the buzz. You see are aren't denying negative feelings, canceling them or denying them. We are trying to pair them with positive feelings and that is what I enjoyed reading your comment. Thank you also for sharing the buzz

Debasish Majumder

Debasish Majumder

3 years ago #8

lovely insight sir Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee! yes, i do agree, there is always a pairing in every thing and human emotions are no different which equally contain two utterly opposite character and obviously one remain predominant, depending upon the conditions favorable for one to become evident. we cannot rule out that death influence on living, triggering us to think how we spent with the concern living persona in absence of him or her. this mindset enable us to overcome sometimes the pain of losing one, and at the same time in other occasion, it may also engulf us with rest of our life to feel the absence of one, depending upon the attachment we may share with someone, rather indulging us to be engulfed with the reminiscence of the past. if we consider the influence of one on us as matter and its quality may impact on us largely, equally we can envisage, the quality of a content we may produce will surely trigger one to make a comment contrary to our produce, as unknowing we are producing a content with the conglomeration of opposite ideas, which may be aptly focused by the readers, enabling them to make comment adverse to our ideas. yet, this is perhaps the beauty of the duality which promote us to roll on with harmony, producing a jive to remain unity in opposites. however, lovely buzz sir. enjoyed read and shared. thank you for the share.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

#4
Harvey Lloyd- the last line of your comment kept me smiling. I greatly appreciate your comment. If I write a buzz so that nobody will find a corner to comment on then I have failed. Not all questions lead to solutions, and more often than not, to more questioning. I have learnt a lot from you and I always look forward to learning more. Closed-ended posts are not the same as open-ended posts because the latter represent real life. I thank you greatly for your most welcome and appreciated comment and I have very similar feelings towards you.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee- for the quality of comments and their pairing might be of interest to you

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee
Harvey Lloyd

Harvey Lloyd

3 years ago #4

Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee i have never quite forgotten my high school education and the disdain for academia that was handed out during this time. Not sure why but my DNA is about solutions, outcomes and purpose driven activities. Academia requires very square corners that are individual to the instructor. In my world of small business i meet PHD's, janitors, secretary's all who received an education where scoring was required. Some never leave this paradigm, everything must be defined, specifically. Your articles are without corners and open up discussion and don't refine them to a single set of definitions. You allow the reader to apply their own and share a journey of learning. Without the feeling there will be a test at the end. Detractors are people who are stuck inside a paradigm of fearing change. Unwilling to adventure into a journey where they cant find a perfect corner to sit in. All we can do is invite them into a world of exploration. The irony of my disposition with academia is, i now own a school. I have had to eat some humble pie and take some real jeering from my High School friends.

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Debasish Majumder

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

I invite my friend who receive repellent ideas to share their views. I extend the invitation out of memory and nowhere to completion it shall be Lisa \ud83d\udc1d Gallagher

Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee

Harvey Lloyd- you are mentioned in this buzz.

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